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Updated: June 15, 2025
"Say, what about that punkin pie?" "You sit right there an' wait." "Chin-Chin!" nodded Spike, and watched her into the house. No sooner was he alone than he was out of his chair and, descending the steps into the garden, sped gleefully away across lawns and along winding paths, following a haphazard course.
Mornings before daylight I slipped into cornfields and borrowed a watermelon, or a mushmelon, or a punkin, or some new corn, or things of that kind. Pap always said it warn't no harm to borrow things if you was meaning to pay them back some time; but the widow said it warn't anything but a soft name for stealing, and no decent body would do it.
"I don't exactly recollect how the the change came about," he faltered. "Well, I do! You ducked out across country the night of the punkin freshet, when I was mud bound and the elephant was afraid of the bridges. You and your dancin' turkey and infant anaconda and a cage of monkeys that wasn't yours and Her!" He shouted the word. "What become of Her, Brick Avery?"
I kin trust ye with my secret, an' I'm goin' ter do it. The Standishes, are New England folk high-toned an' mighty particler. It's as easy fer them ter be virtuous as ter eat punkin pie fer breakfast. I come from Wisconsin, where we think more of our bodies than our souls; an' 'twas in Wisconsin that I first met Dr. Standish. He had a call to the town, wher I lived with with my sister.
An' thar he sot like a punkin, not sayin' a word nur doin' nothin'. An' while Polly Ann was a-wonderin' ef he was gone plumb crazy, blame me ef that durned fool didn't turn roun' to that peppery gal an' say, "Booh, Polly Ann!"
Susanna suddenly called out to the girl sitting upon the porch step and thus ruefully communing with herself: "Ka-ty! Katharine!" "Yes, Widow Sprigg! Here I am coming. What is it? Something to do?" "Well, I should say 'twas somethin' to do! Here's that wild-headed Monty took an' scampered off just as I was takin' this batch of punkin pies out the oven.
We told stories without the least point. Blunt and I made atrocious puns. I believe, indeed, that Miss Blunt herself made one little punkin, as I called it. If there had been any superfluous representative of humanity present, to register the fact, I should say that we made fools of ourselves. But as there was no fool on hand, I need say nothing about it.
"These punkin races is all half-mile dashes, best two out of three. Peewee's geldin' is a distance hoss he don't get goin' good under a mile. In a bull-ring sprint he ain't got a chance with this black stud of Butsy's. "Our game is to have Butsy turn his dash-hound loose the first heat.
Think of it. Suppose this uncle of ours had accepted. Suppose he had come to town here and any of our friends had met him. 'This is our guardian, Captain Warren, of Punkin Centre. 'Please to meet ye, says Uncle 'Lish. 'How's taters? Horrors! Say, Caro, you haven't told anyone, Malcolm or his mother, or anyone, have you?" "Of course not, Steve. You know I wouldn't." "Well, don't.
"I'm interested in freaks," said Hiram, "and I'll take this case off your hands and see that the livin' skeleton don't get away until we decide to bury him or put him in a show where he can earn an honest livin'. Skeletons ain't what they used to be for a drawin'-card, but I know of two or three punkin circuiters that might take him on."
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