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The following are such as are perennial, and are of the most troublesome nature, being xtremely difficult to get rid of in consequence of their creeping roots. It unfortunately appens that, where the land is the most worked, and the roots the more broken thereby, the more the crop of weeds increases on the land.
I was not in the mood for exchanging confidences as to my prospective matrimonial affairs, and my silence must have said as much. "Beggin' your pardon, sir; but seein' as 'ow you're a doctor, I wonder if you 'appens to know our bloke in the Jackass?" "Who, your doctor?" "Yessir. Tall orficer 'e is, close on six foot 'igh, wi' black 'air, wot jined the Navy special fur the war. Name o' Brown."
There was an uncomfortable silence. "Oh, dear," said Bobbie, with a sigh, "I do believe you're CROSS." "What, me? Not me!" said Perks loftily; "it ain't nothing to me." "What AIN'T nothing to you?" said Peter, too anxious and alarmed to change the form of words. "Nothing ain't nothing. What 'appens either 'ere or elsewhere," said Perks; "if you likes to 'ave your secrets, 'ave 'em and welcome.
This startled me much, and I asked hurriedly, "What do you mean?" without reflecting that to ask for private information from a servant about my father's habits was as bad as investigating into a stranger's affairs. It did not strike me in the same light. "Mr. Philip," said Morphew, "a thing 'as 'appened as 'appens more often than it ought to. Master has got awful keen about money in his old age."
So long as you don't tell the skipper I don't mind. If anything 'appens you'll catch it too, Bill. "He climbed ashore, and I follered 'im to the gate and unlocked it. He was screwing up 'is eye ready for a wink, but I give 'im such a look that he thought better of it, and, arter rubbing his eye with 'is finger as though he 'ad got a bit o' dust in it, he went off.
The front door opened, and a slatternly woman in a soiled print dress came shuffling down the flagged pathway to the gate. She wore cloth boots, and Tilda took note that one of them was burst. "Go away," said the woman, opening the gate just wide enough to thrust out her head. "We don't give nothing to beggars." "I could 'a told you that," retorted Tilda. "But as it 'appens, I ain't one."
I 'appens to 'ave a most aggrawating thirst in my gargler." A burst of laughter followed this ponderous attempt at humour. "'And it over, sonny, I wants it." I merely raised my head and ran my eyes over him. He was an ugly brute, and no mistake. A man of tremendous girth.
Bein' own brother to 'is sister's 'usband it's plainly your place to give 'im wot for if 'e 'appens to need it." The stoker grunted and the clock belonging to the Anglo-Norman church tower of the village struck six. Both the engineer and his subordinate wiped their dewy foreheads with their blackened hands, and simultaneously thought of beer.
"Well," he said, with a glance at the door to make sure that there were no witnesses to an act of which the aristocrat in him disapproved, "go on!" Keggs breathed freely. The danger-point was past. "'Aving a natural interest, your lordship," he said, "we of the Servants' 'All generally manage to become respectfully aware of whatever 'appens to be transpirin' above stairs.
I inwents the noos as I goes along; an you should see that old lady's face, an' the way 'er eyes opens we'n I'm a tapin' off the murders an' the 'ighway robberies, an' the burglaries an' the fires at 'ome, an' the wars an' earthquakes an' other scrimmages abroad. It do cheer 'er up most wonderful. Of course, I stick in any hodd bits o' real noos I 'appens to git hold of, but I ain't partickler."
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