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Updated: June 25, 2025
It is, true there is a Council consisting of a great Number of Persons, in whose Name all great Affairs relating to the Civil Government are transacted, the Members of which Council are call'd Bable-Cypherians; but it is no Secret, that the first Minister causes whom he pleases to sit in this Council, as well as turns out any Person he dislikes; and while I was amongst them, there happen'd some Instances of what I maintain; and he contrived to have several whom he suspected of being Enemies to his Family, or to his Administration, to be disgraced from the said Council, and others appointed in their Places: Nay, I have often seen several worthless Birds paying their Court to the first Minister, and solliciting him to be admitted into the Great Council, in the same manner that they begg'd for an Employment; yet at the same time, if you were to talk to a Cacklogallinian, he wou'd pretend to persuade you, that no Fowl of any Rank or Quality whatsoever can ever sit in the said Council, but by the Majority of free Voices of Persons who are his Equals.
Now it happen'd in a certain Solunarian Island, that for want of a better, one of their High Priests was put into the Civil Administration, and made a Lazognian. In the Neighbourhood of this Man's Jurisdiction, one of their own Solunarian Priests had turn'd Crolian, and whether he had a better Tallent at performance, or rather was more diligent in his Office is not material, but he set up a kind of a Crolian Temple in an old Barn, or some such Mechanick Building, and all the People flock'd after him.
"The Soldier, who fear'd no Colours, was no way frighten'd at what happen'd to others, having often before, Arm'd with Steel, fought against Men, now arm'd with Faith, Hope and Charity, and confiding in God's Mercy, went on boldly to fight against Devils; so recommending himself to all their Prayers, and making the Sign of the Cross on his Forehead, courageously enter'd the Door, which the Prior Locked on the outside and Return'd in Procession with his Clergy to the Church.
To prove the times more exactly, he produces the Records of the Country, which are a Parcel of Reeds, of different Lengths, with several distinct Marks, known to none but themselves; by which they seem to guess, very exactly, at Accidents that happen'd many Years ago; nay two or three Ages or more. But, to return to the dead Man.
The old man, seeing me sincere, began to comfort me; and the better to effect it, told me what formerly had happen'd to himself on the like occasion. "In Asiam cum a quaestore essem stipendio eductus, hospitium Pergami accepi.
When these are gone and thou alone in the Hall, Evil Spirits will immediately come to tempt thee; For so it happen'd to other that went in here before thee, but be thou of Manly courage, and Stedfast in the Faith of Jesus Christ."
I believe not, replied my uncle Toby, after some pause for being inland, as I said, and having Silesia and Moravia to the east; Lusatia and Upper Saxony to the north; Franconia to the west; and Bavaria to the south; Bohemia could not have been propell'd to the sea without ceasing to be Bohemia nor could the sea, on the other hand, have come up to Bohemia, without overflowing a great part of Germany, and destroying millions of unfortunate inhabitants who could make no defence against it Scandalous! cried Trim Which would bespeak, added my uncle Toby, mildly, such a want of compassion in him who is the father of it that, I think, Trim the thing could have happen'd no way.
Wherefore ev'ry man, When his affairs go on most swimmingly, E'en then it most behooves to arm himself Against the coming storm: loss, danger, exile, Returning ever, let him look to meet; His son in fault, wife dead, or daughter sick; All common accidents, and may have happen'd That nothing shall seem new or strange.
"Except," went on the Bishop, "returnin' any little change he happen'd to borry from you, or swoppin' horses, or tellin' the size of the fish he happened to ketch. On them p'ints, my bretherin, the lamented corpse was pow'ful weak; an' I'm sorry to have to tell it, but I've been warned, as you all kno', to speak the exact facts."
He gave his Reason, at which he seem'd satisfied, but said it was dangerous to let a Baccararo know their Retreat; that he would tell Captain Thomas, and he must expect his Orders concerning me. Cuffey said he would go to give Captain Thomas an Account of what had happen'd in this Sortie, and would carry me with him. As they spoke in the Negroes English, I understood them perfectly well.
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