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Updated: June 22, 2025
Ain smart like dey used to be. An times ain good like dey was. Ef'n it hadnt been for some of dem crazy fools, actin up and smarty, me an my wife'd be gittin maybe a hun'ered an' more dollars a month, 'stead o the fifteen we gits 'tween us for ole' age help. They'd ought to let Rosevelt alone. An its his own folks as is fitin' 'im. He is a big man even ef he is a Democrat. I'm a Republican though.
"Yes, we're nearly there," said the Governor, as he drew in his head, and Miss Lydia slept again until the carriage turned into the drive and stopped before the portico. Uncle Shadrach, in the open doorway, was grinning with delight. "Ef'n de snow had er kep' you, dar 'ouldn't a been no Christmas for de res' er us," he declared.
"Dis yer coffee hit's done 'mos' bile away," he remarked gloomily. "En ef'n it don' tase like hit oughter tase, 'tain' no use ter tu'n up yo' nose, caze 'tain' de faul' er de coffee, ner de faul' er me nurr." "How are you, old man?" asked Bland, turning over in the shadow. "Who's there?" responded Dan, as he peered from the light into the obscurity. "All the mess except Welch, poor devil.
I dunno w'at makes me kyar so much er bout'n her no way; dar's plenty er likelier gals'n her, an' I jes' b'lieve dat's er trick nigger; anyhow she's tricked me, sho's yer born; an' ef'n I didn't b'long ter nobody, I'd jump right inter dis creek an' drown myse'f.
"Durin' slavery times de slaves would hab ter git fum dere marster a pas' 'fore dey could visit dere own people on de uther plantations. Ef'n you had no pass you would git in trouble ef caught wid out one which allus ment a good whuppin' w'en dey returned.
"Ef'n de nigger hadn't ben so sleepy-headed, he'd er ben white, an' his hyar'd er ben straight des like yourn. Yer see, atter de Lord make 'im, den he lont him up 'gins de fence-corner in de sun fur ter dry; an' no sooner wuz de Lord's back turnt, an' de sun 'gun ter come out kin'er hot, dan de nigger he 'gun ter nod, an' er little mo'n he wuz fas' ter sleep.
"Dat time when the Yanks was goin' to Augusta, an I went to black my Marster's boot, he'd give us a two-cent peice, big as a quarter for boot blackin, I say, 'Marster who is dem soldiers? An he say to me, 'Dey's de Yankees, come to try to take you awy from me. An I say, 'Looks like to me Marster, ef'n dey wants to take us dey'd arsk you fer us. Marster laughed and say, 'Boy!
Now wat yer say? speak yer min'. Ef'n yer able an' willin' ter tote me fum hyear ter de crick, I'll ontie yer; ef'n yer ain't, den far yer well, caze I mus' be er gittin' erlong.
She had great faith in the curative properties of a very nauseous vermifuge that she had made herself by stewing some kind of herbs in molasses, and every morning she would administer a teaspoonful of it to every child under her care; and she used to say, "Ef'n hit want fur dat furmifuge, den marster wouldn't hab all dem niggers w'at yer see hyear."
"'Umph! says Pigunawaya, sezee, 'ain't dis Nancy Jane O, de swif'es'-flyin' bird dey is? sezee; 'wat ail 'long yer, chile? wat yer cryin' 'bout? An' atter Nancy Jane O she up an' tol' 'im, den de frog sez: "'Now look er yer; I wuz er gwine myse'f ter see ef'n I could'n git dat gol'-stone; hit's true I don't stan' much showin' 'long o' birds, but den ef'n eber I gits dar, wy I kin jes jump right in an' fotch up de stone wile de birds is er waitin' fur de crick ter run down.
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