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Updated: June 15, 2025
Another gentleman, taking his seat opposite to me and ordering hot buttered toast, I left hastily. At eight o'clock in the evening Minikin called round from the office to know what had happened. Seeking help from shame, I confessed to him the truth. "Thought as much," he answered. "Seems to have been an A1 from the look of you." "I am glad it has happened, now it is over," I said to him.
To imprison his elegant person behind a counter in Cranbourne-alley was, to be sure, in a cruel father's power; but his tyranny could not extend to his mind; and, whilst he was weighing minikin pins, or measuring out penny ribbon, his soul, leaving all these meaner things, was expatiating in Bond-street or Hyde-park.
Caesar told me a pretty experiment of his of angling with a minikin, a gut- string varnished over, which keeps it from swelling, and is beyond any hair for strength and smallness. The secret I like mightily. 19th.
Now, when the Prince of Wales invites him to dine at Marlborough 'ouse, 'e don't want to go there tacked on to a girl that carries aitches with her in a bag, and don't know which end of the spoon out of which to drink 'er soup." "It makes a difference, of course," agreed Minikin. "What we've got to do," said Jarman, "is to get 'im out of it. And upon my sivvy, blessed if I see 'ow to do it!"
Minikin to women of rotten reputation, the parties were reconciled to each other, and peace and concord re-established in the mess. Fathom acquired universal applause for his discreet and humane conduct upon this occasion; and that same afternoon had an opportunity of seeing the lady in whose cause he had exerted himself.
"Who could you trust?" asked the cautious Jarman. "Besides, there ain't time. She's letting 'im rest to-day; to-morrow evening she'll be down on 'im." "Don't see anything for it," said Minikin, "but for him to do a bunk." "Not a bad idea that," mused Jarman; "only where's 'e to bunk to?" "Needn't go far," said Minikin. "She'd find 'im out and follow 'im," said Jarman.
"Killed a policeman?" suggested Minikin. "Got myself engaged." "No one like you quiet fellows for going it when you do begin," commented Minikin. "Nice girl?" "I don't know," I answered. "I only know I don't want her. How can I get out of it?" Minikin removed his left eye and commenced to polish it upon his handkerchief, a habit he had when in doubt.
Having satisfied himself, he handed me back my letter. "Want my advice?" he asked. I thought it might be useful to me, so replied in the affirmative. "Hook it," was his curt counsel. "Why?" I asked. "Isn't he a good employer?" Replacing his glass eye, he turned again to his work. "If employment is what you want," answered Mr. Minikin, "you'll get it. Best employer in London.
He enjoyed his good time while it lasted, and eventually married the eldest daughter of a small blacking factory. She was a plain girl, but pleasant, and later brought to Jarman possession of the factory. When I meet him he is now stout and rubicund he gives me the idea of a man who has attained to his ideals. With Minikin we had more trouble. People turned up possessed of scientific smattering.
This expedition being happily finished, General Macleaver put the whole army, navy, transports, and scene of action into a canvas bag, the prince unsaddled his nose, and Captain Minikin being admitted, our hero was introduced in form.
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