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Updated: June 13, 2025
I remembered the story about the feller that cal'lated his chickens wouldn't tell any different, so he fed 'em sawdust instead of corn-meal, and by-and-bye a settin' of eggs hatched out twelve of the chickens had wooden legs and the thirteenth was a woodpecker. Say, I felt so much like two cords of four-foot stove wood that it made me plumb nervous to ketch sight of a saw-buck.
You're considerable smart, Miss Jinny, but I'll bet you can't tell me where I was, now." "I do not care to know. The place might save you again." He showed his disappointment. "I cal'lated it might interest you to know how I dodged the Sovereign State of Missouri. General Halleck made an order that released a man from enrolling on payment of ten dollars. I paid.
'Twa'n't a remark cal'lated to encourage conversation, so I didn't try again not till his umbrella turned inside out on the Denboro platform. Ho! ho! I wish you'd have seen his face then." At Denboro he pointed out Pete Shattuck's livery stable, where the horse and buggy came from which had been the means of transporting Graves and himself to South Denboro. "See!" he cried.
I heard tell there was a feller of your name runnin' some gold- brick scheme at Rogerses', an' I cal'lated I'd come over an' see you. Why, " The Professor evidently thought that they would do well to leave these troubled waters. He jammed the tiller down, and tried to sheer away. It was the most unfortunate moment possible. "Look out!" shouted Sprague; "look out! You're going "
Phil said he was sorry we turned in so early the night afore. Said he'd planned to entertain us all the evening. We didn't hurrah much at this being suspicious, as I said and he changed the subject to ice-boats. That ice-boat was a bird. I cal'lated to know a boat when I sighted one, but a flat-iron on skates was something bran-new.
"Why, if you mean that they've all given up hope, I should hardly say that. Captain Mayo and Captain Daniels were speaking of it in my hearing the other day and they agreed that there was still a chance." "A pretty slim one, though, they cal'lated, didn't they?" "Well, they were were doubtful, of course. There was the possibility that he had been wrecked somewhere and hadn't been picked up.
'Twas all dark; could n't see my hand afore me. Crep' 'long the floor. See 't was covered with sawdust. Tuk off m' boots, 'n' got up on m' feet, 'n' walked careful. Did n' dast holler t' Ray. Cal'lated when the squabble come I 'd be ready t' dew business. All t' once I felt a slant 'n the floor. 'T was kind o' slip'ry, 'n' I begun t' slide. Feet went out from under me 'n' sot me down quick.
"I s'pose she thought 'twas fun to be talked deef when they was courtin'," Captain Seth had once sagely remarked. "Prob'ly it sounded then like a putty piece on a seraphine; but I allers cal'lated she'd git her fill of it, sooner or later. You most gin'lly git your fill o' one tune." "How are you this afternoon, Aunt Lyddy?" asked Eph, walking in without knocking, and sitting down near her.
"Oh, I was goin' to make it smallpox, but I asked Doctor Parker if there was anything worse than smallpox and he said he cal'lated leprosy was about as bad as any disease goin'. It worked fine while it lasted, but the Board of Health made me take it down; said there wan't any leprosy on the premises.
Mary felt his arms tighten about her and she realized a little of the struggle he was making. Yet his tone was brave and cheerful. "Yes," he said. "Well, I I kind of cal'lated that would come some day or other. It's all right, Mary-'Gusta. Zoeth and me have talked it over and all we want is to see you happy. If you said yes to him, Zoeth and I'll say 'God bless you' to both of you."
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