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Updated: May 27, 2025
I think I hear the West Point cadets a larfin at him. Who brought that are scare-crow out of standin corn and stuck him here? I guess that are citizen came from away down east out of the Notch of the White Mountains. If they'd keep less horses, and more sheep, they'd have food and clothing, too, instead of buying both.
But somehow it didn't tase right, an' wen dey come ter fine out what war de matter, dey hab sent him a barrel ob san' wid some sugar on top, an' wen de sugar war all gone de san' war dare. Wen I yeard it, I jis' split my sides a larfin. It war too good to keep; an' wen it got roun', Jake war as mad as a March hare. But it sarved him right."
"It are this then I'm larfin' at," replied Rube, sobering down a little, "I wa'n't at Bent's three days when who do 'ee think shed kum to the Fort?" "Who? Maybe the Rapahoes!" "Them same Injuns; an' the very niggurs as set me afoot. They kum to the Fort to trade wi' Bill, an' thur I sees both my old mar an' rifle!" "You got them back then?" "That wur likely.
"We shall soon have Wards enuff," sed the editer of the Baldinsville "Bugle of Liberty," who was lookin over a bundle of exchange papers in the corner, "to apply to the legislater for a City Charter!" "Good for you, old man!" sed I; "giv that air a conspickius place in the next "Bugle." "How redicklus," sed pretty Susan Fletcher, coverin her face with her knittin work & larfin like all possest.
Sez he, "Bust my gizzud but it's grate doins," & then he larfed as if he'd kill hisself. Sez I, risin and puttin on a austeer look, "William, I woodunt be a fool if I had common cents." But he kept on larfin till he was black in the face, when he fell over on to the bunk where the hostler sleeps, and in a still small voice sed, "Twins!"
'Tain't ez ef she kep within' call, but t'other day she went clean over ter Hancocks, a hull mile an' a half! She sez she hez ter go where folks wants things done, but that's nonsense, folks oughter want things done near at hand, they know how lonesome I be. Why, a bear might cum in an' eat me up for all Penel would know. She gits so taken up a' larfin' an' singin', she ain't got no sympathy.
"As soon as the money was staked, I said, 'Hadn't we better, says I, 'draw stakes? That 'ere blood horse of your'n has such uncommon particular bottom, he'll perhaps leave me clean out of sight. 'No fear of that, said he, larfin', 'but he'll beat you easy, anyhow. No flinchin', says he, 'I'll not let you go back of the bargain.
I's bin wakin' a good while, larfin fit to bu'st my sides. De purfesser's been agoin' on like a mad renoceros for more 'n an hour. He's arter suthin, which he can't ketch. Listen! You hear 'im goin' round an' round on his tip-toes. Dere goes anoder chair. I only hope he won't smash de lamp an' set de house a-fire." "Veil, veil; I've missed him zee tence time. Nevair mind.
"Sure it's more like a ghost the doctor is, in spite of his larfin'. But wonders 'll niver cease. I'll lave 'im wid an aisy mind, for he's in good hands. Now, Joe, clear out o' the door, like a good man, an' let me through. They'll be wantin' me at the camp. A good haul, Joe, I'm tough; no fear o' me comin' to pieces. Och! but it's a poor cabin. An Irish pig wouldn't thank ye for it."
I never did like that chap; but when he comes in 'ere, with his white 'at, telling me how to manage my own business, and larfin', yis larfin', why, I've done with him. And I told him str'ight," etc. "Quodlings', eh?" said Gammon reflectively. "They're likely to be wanting a new traveller, I should say." "They will if they take my advice," replied the shopkeeper.
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