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Updated: May 24, 2025
Ike wears specks and always carries a little basket on his arm. he cant see very well, and father said to me, now you jest keep still and you will see some fun and when Ike came along father changed his voice so that it sounded awfully growly and said where in the devil are you going with that basket, and Ike was scart most to deth and said only a little way down here sir and father said, move on sir and move dam lively and i nearly died laffing to see Ike hiper. well after a while i see Ike coming back with old Swane and old Kize the policemen. i tell you i was scart but father only laffed and said you keep still and i will fix it all right. so when they came up he said to old Kize what is the trouble Filander and he said Mr.
Then my chum asked Pa if he didn't want to come up and take the grand bumper degree, and Pa laffed and said he didn't care if he did, just to encourage us boys in innocent pastime, that was so improving to our intellex. "We had shut the goat up in a closet in my room, and he had got over blatting, so we took off the handkerchief, and he was eating some of my paper collars, and skate straps.
I take pride, sir, in makin' this apology. An' I says: 'I be a' illit'rate, humble man, Mr. Markham; but I will venture the liberty to tell ye ez ye mought take mo' pride in givin' no occasion fur apologies ter poverty. Them fellers standin' aroun' jes' laffed.
While waitin' ter see ther fun, I seen over at er table a feller smilin' like, and I tho't by his face he war a Yankee, so I went over, and sez I: 'parler vouse Fronsa? Then he laffed and said: 'Yes, a little, but I understand English better. Then I shuk his hand 'nd axed him wot ther row war, an 'nd ef he tho't that thar man hed gone fur a wepin.
But I never called him anything but the Old Man, and that name seemed to fit him, for he wuz one of your sollum babies, alwuz thinkin' 'nd thinkin' 'nd thinkin', like he wuz a jedge, and when he laffed it wuzn't like other children's laffs, it wuz so sad-like.
The callers had stopped coming, and the girls were drinking something out of shaving cups that looked like lather, and they said it was 'aignogg. They laffed and kicked up their heels wuss nor a circus, and their collars got unpinned, and their faces was red, and they put their arms around me and my chum and hugged us and asked us if we didn't want some of the custard.
"She never was straight we all knowed that but him, but she was slick, and she was swingin' her throwrope for him in about a week after they brought her in from the Middle West to teach the school in that district. Anybody that said a word ag'in' her to him would have gone to the hospital. So he went ahead and married her while she laffed at him to his own hired men.
"I never ast to git put up ther'," he heard the sick man saying; "never ast, an' didn't want. It was her doin's, an' I tell you fellers right here she's jest thet serrupy an' good as don't matter. I'd 'a' rotted down here wi' flies an' the heat for all they'd 'a' cared. That blind son of a 'ud 'a' jest laffed ef I'd handed over, an' Jake say, we'll level our score one day, sure.
He walked up and shook hands and says: 'I'm Bradley Clay. I says: 'Dang it, I can't help it. He kinder stiffened his back, then he laffed and says: 'Mr. Saylor, there is a stock sale down at Paint Lick Saturday; come down; you might get some good cattle and sheep cheap for your fine pasture lands. I says: 'All right, young feller, I'll be thar.
He needs watching if you want to get on a racket. I don't guess he ever laffed in his life. Not even at a cirkis. Yep. He's a holy terror when he's mad. He cowhided me t'other day so I ain't sat right in a week. If he was to start in to fix you that way, why " "I don't guess he'll cowhide me," said Elvine quickly, as she swung herself into the saddle. "I'm not likely go on a racket."
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