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Updated: May 31, 2025
Then 'e says as 'ow I've been cheatin', so I says to 'im, polite like, as 'ow I 'adn't done no such thing, an' wi' that 'e ups an' 'its me in the eye, sir, which isn't fair." "He hit you in the eye?" asked Number One. "Yes, sir," said the sea-soldier, exhibiting a rapidly swelling cheek. "What have you to say?" the First Lieutenant asked the alleged assailant. "What he says isn't true, sir.
He said ole marster hed taught Marse Chan; dat ole marster wuz a wuss ab'litionis' dan he son. I looked at Marse Chan, an' sez to myse'f: 'Fo' Gord! old Cun'l Chahmb'lin better min', an' I hedn' got de wuds out, when ole Cun'l Chahmb'lin 'cuse' old marster o' cheatin' 'im out o' he niggers, an' stealing piece o' he lan' dat's de lan' I tole you 'bout.
An' this littlish blade's broke, you see, but I wouldn't hev a new un put in, 'cause they might be cheatin' me an' givin' me another knife instid, for there isn't such a blade i' the country, it's got used to my hand, like. An' there was niver nobody else gen me nothin' but what I got by my own sharpness, only you, Mr.
Dretful interestin' to look at these rough little inventions and to speculate on what prophetic strivin's, and yearnin's, and heartaches, and despairs, and triumphs went into every one on 'em. For every one on 'em wuz follered, as a man is by his black shadder, by the cold, evil spirits of unbelief, malice, envy, and cheatin'.
"Might not have been killed?" exclaimed the cowboy. "Everythin' square? Why, when he said that Johnnie was cheatin' and acted like such a jackass? And then in the saloon he fairly walked up to git hurt?" With these arguments the cowboy browbeat the Easterner and reduced him to rage. "You're a fool!" cried the Easterner, viciously. "You're a bigger jackass than the Swede by a million majority.
You had better look to your own dealin's, and let me alone, you pedlin', cheatin' Yankee clockmaker you. "'Elder, sais I, 'if you warn't too mean to rile a man, I'd give you a kick on your pillion, that would send you a divin' arter your hoss; but you ain't worth it.
Sez I, not mindin' his persiflage, "The Japans are the politest nation on the earth; they say cheatin' and lyin' hain't polite, and so they don't want to foller 'em; they hitch principle and politeness right up in one team and ride after it." "Wall," sez he, "I do and always have."
The newspaper, as he turned from page to page, rustled with a slow and comfortable sound. Then suddenly he heard three terrible words: "You are cheatin'!" Such scenes often prove that there can be little of dramatic import in environment. Any room can present a tragic front; any room can be comic. This little den was now hideous as a torture-chamber.
In course you ain't a good hand at cheatin' all round up at the school! What? In course you ain't saying nice things agin me all over the place and in course some of us wouldn't like to see you get a reg'lar good hiding, wouldn't we? Bless you, I knows all about it; but I'm mum, never fear!" Loman was furious. "The young liar!" he exclaimed. "I did owe him one; I'll pay him when we get back!"
"Whoever he marries now, Mis' Bascom'll have to say 't was the one she meant," laughed the Widow Buzzell. "I never was caught cheatin' yet, and if I live till Saturday I shall be seventy-one years old," said the old lady with some heat. "Hand me Jot's lead pencil, Diademy, and that old envelope on the winder sill. I'll write the name I think of, and shut it up in the old Bible.
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