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So Devereux, when they returned to his lodgings, had lost much of his reserve, and once on the theme of his grief, stormed on in gusts, and lulls, and thunder, and wild upbraidings, and sudden calms; and the good-natured soul of little Puddock was touched, and though he did not speak, he often dried his eyes quietly, for grief is conversant not with self, but with the dead, and whatever is generous moves us.
Even on his death-bed he still held back and was averse to sign what he looked upon as his own death-warrant, and just at the last gasp, amidst the anxious looks and silent upbraidings of friends and relatives that surrounded him, he summoned resolution to hold out his feeble hand, which was guided by others, to trace his name, and he fell back a corpse!
He realized it when he saw Baby sprawling in the safe hollow of her lap. He had meant to tell Winny that she mustn't stay; but she had him by those absurd petticoats of hers, and behind her petticoats he shielded himself from the upbraidings of his sanity. But Winny knew. She was not going to stay, to be there with him more than was strictly necessary.
Upon one occasion, in reply to some of his self upbraidings, she said, "I think, Robert, you're owre hard on yoursel' now, when ye tak the blame o' puir Susie's death; ye surely canna think itherwise than the dear bairn's time had come; an' had we bided at hame it would ha' been a' the same; for we dinna leeve an' dee by chance, and the bounds o' our lives are set by Him who kens a' things."
"That this government, seeing no propriety in the measure, nor conceiving itself to be under any obligation to communicate to the ministers of the French republic all the unpleasant details of what had passed between it and the British minister here, or with the minister of foreign affairs at the court of London on these accounts, conscious of its fair dealing toward all the belligerent powers, and wrapped up in its own integrity, little expected, under the circumstances which have been enumerated, the upbraidings it has met with; notwithstanding, it now is, as it always has been, the earnest wish of the government to be on the best and most friendly footing with the republic of France; and we have no doubt, after giving this candid exposition of facts, that the Directory will revoke the orders under which our trade is suffering, and will pay the damages it has sustained thereby."
In the narrow space between the beds they pulled out and pushed back their boxes or baskets, and with each effort came an outburst of impatience and furious upbraidings against the landlady. "What a hole!" "She'll be putting another bed in here soon." "Sure! But I won't stay!" "Where would yer go? It ain't no better nowhere else." The complaining, mixed with a desultory chatter, continued.
Mathews, she fell asleep, her last waking hope being that when she stood before Alan Macdonald's couch again it would be to see him smile. Frances woke toward the decline of day, with upbraidings for having yielded to nature's ministrations for so long. Still, everything must be progressing well with Alan Macdonald, or Mrs. Mathews would have called her.
Abuse, scorn, upbraidings, even violence she had been prepared for all of these. There was something about this self-restraint, however, this strange, brooding silence, which terrified her more than anything she could have imagined. "Philip!" she shrieked. "You're not going? You're not going like this? You haven't said anything!" He closed the door with firm fingers.
The governess broke out on her vehemently in French, very comically mingling her upbraidings of her charge, her abuse of the little girl, and her apprehension of "Madame." "Never mind; she does not know any better," said Gordon. The child's face brightened at this friendly encouragement. "She is a nasty little creature! You shall not play with her," cried the governess, angrily.
And all Rubinstein's upbraidings, all the eloquent logic of Laroche, could move him to nothing but the reiterated statement that, years before, at his court-martial, he had been conscious of no fault for which to lower his head; whereas this time alas! he had been guilty of many more than one: of laziness; of preposterous vanity; finally, worst of all, of that unpardonable cowardice and self-consciousness whereby he had lost his final hope of scraping through the ordeal by means of his native wit and the experience and influence of the concertmeister Gruening.
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