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Updated: June 23, 2025
He may lie a long in't, there's just room for an old join'd Stool besides the Bed, which one cannot call a Cabin, about the largeness of a Pantry Bin, or a Usurer's Trunk; there had been Dornex Curtains to't in the days of Yore; but they were now annihilated, and nothing left to save his Eyes from the Light, but my Landlady's Blue Apron, ty'd by the strings before the Window, in which stood a broken six-penny Looking-Glass, that shew'd as many Faces as the Scene in Henry the Eighth, which could but just stand upright, and then the Comb-Case fill'd it.
Here's Rendon, and through it we go with a spanking clatter. Here's Doctor Corney's dog-cart post-haste again. For there's no dying without him now, and Repentance is on the death-bed for not calling him in before. Half a charge of humbug hurts no son of a gun, friend Vernon, if he'd have his firing take effect. Be tender to't in man or woman, particularly woman.
I knew Lycas was jealous, which kept me tongue-ty'd so long, and the love he bore his wife made him discover to her, his inclination to me: But the first opportunity we had of talking together, she related to me what she had learn'd from him; and I frankly confess'd it, but withal told her how absolutely averse I had ever been to't: "Well then," quoth the discreet woman, "we must try our wits, according to his own opinion, the permission was one's, and the possession another's."
I put him to't, he dares not fight; and he that expects my favour to so high a degree as marriage must be none of my lord Maiors whifflers ; he must be valiant in Armes.
Fran. Jul. Fran. Jul. Since you've lost your Honour with your wits, I'll try what mine will do. Enter Carlos, Turks. Fran. Oh, I am lost, I'm lost dear Wife, most mighty Sir, I've brought her finely to't do not make me lose my credit with his Mahometan Grace, my Wife has a monstrous Affection for your Honour, but she's something bashful; but when alone your Magnanimousness will find her a swinger.
And though he were my God as well as King, I would instruct thee how to disobey him; Thou shalt, Erminia, bravely say, I will not; He cannot force thee to't against thy will. Oh Gods, shall duty to a King and Father Make thee commit a Murder on thy self, Thy sacred self, and me that do adore thee?
"Look'ee here: no doubt you'm 'mazed, but that's a curst foolish trick, all the same. Be that tangle fast, you'm holding by?" The man made no sign of comprehension. "Best not trust to't, I reckon," muttered Zeb: "must get past en an' make fast round a rib. Ah! would 'ee, ye varment?"
Uds bud how doth this tickle him! what a new mirth and pleasure is this again! see him now stand there and look like a Monky with a Cat in his arms. O what a delicate pretty condition he's now in! Well Midwife look to't, for this joy hath taken such a tyrannical possession of his heart, that doubt not but immediately there will be a good present for you, when he gives it you back again.
Sometimes the frugal matron seems in haste, Nor cares to beat her pudding into paste: Yet milk in proper skillet she will place, And gently spice it with a blade of mace; Then set some careful damsel to look to't; And still to stir away the bishop's-foot; For if burnt milk shou'd to the bottom stick, Like over-heated-zeal, 'twould make folks sick.
For the new Wife is no sooner come to be at quiet; but she begins to complain, that she can hardly addict her self to this new way of life; that it appears very strange and odly to her to converse with a new Maid, by reason she must be telling her this thing, and commanding her the t'other; and have a regard of all what she does, which are things that she before never used to trouble her self with; and that it is such a trouble to her to be out of her Parents house, in a strange dwelling place: Nay, this oft-times surges so high, that the good man hath his hands full of work to comfort her, and to talk these foolish fancies out of her noddle; and verily, unless he can bridle her frivolous humour with some pleasant discourses, and dry up her tears with no small number of kisses; oh then he'l be sadly put to't.
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