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Updated: June 1, 2025
The old man took a kind of wonderful sugarplum out of the ivory horn, and gave it to Peter to eat. "You will have the dream next time you sleep," said he, and trudged on. So Peter continued his journey, stopping every once in a while to look back at the strange old man, who was slowly climbing the hill.
You young ladies, may you have plucked pretty giftlings from it; and out of the cracker sugarplum which you have split with the captain or the sweet young curate may you have read one of those delicious conundrums which the confectioners introduce into the sweetmeats, and which apply to the cunning passion of love. Those riddles are to be read at YOUR age, when I dare say they are amusing.
A friend of mine, indeed, assured me that he yearly spent 1000fr., but then he was a notorious liar, so very possibly he was not telling the truth. "Thank Heaven," says the men, "at least we shall get off the sugarplum tax this year."
This last chapter is exquisitely epicurean, dealing with table-setting, table-service, and the proper order of entrees, roasts, salads, and dessert. It closes and the book closes with a sort of sugarplum paean, the sweets and spices being in the end gracefully spiritualised. "Sugar-plums complete the pleasantness and enjoyment of the dessert, and serve, as it were, to satisfy pleasure.
The young blooming beauty who found little Duncan "wallowing in the dust" and bribed him with a sugarplum to reveal the name of her future husband; the "sempstress with an itching desire for a parson"; housekeepers in search of stolen goods; the "widow who bounced" from one end of the room to the other and finally "scuttled too airily downstairs for a woman in her clothes"; and the chambermaid disguised as a fine lady, who by "the toss of her head, the jut of the bum, the sidelong leer of the eye" proclaimed her real condition these types are treated by Defoe in a blunt realistic manner entirely foreign to Eliza Haywood's vein.
"You see, we girls think everything of you; and now we don't like it that you don't like our fashions." "Why, my little princess, so long as I like you better than your fashions, and merely think they are not worthy of you, what's the harm?" "Oh yes, to be sure. You sweeten the dose to us babies with that sugarplum. But really, Mr. Crowfield, why don't you like the fashions?"
I am curious to see what sort of a sugarplum face, turned out by the dozen, he will stick on my torso which will please me, at any rate, for a couple of days. Find me a good model for the bust of the Sappho I am to restore. A thousand gadflies are buzzing in my brain I am so tremendously excited! What I am planning now will come to something!"
The impassive spinster whose voice never rises at home above the most polite whisper screams with delight at the first sugarplum that hits her, and furtively supplies her nieces with ammunition to carry on the war. "It is such fun, isn't it, papa?" shout the boys as they lean breathless over the balcony, laughing and pelting at the crowd that laughs and pelts back again.
One of them, the sentry at the door, had not time to see me before I gave him a sugarplum in his stomach, and then, before the others could come out, I jumped on the horse and was off like a shot. Eight or ten of them followed me, I think; but I took the crossroads through the woods. I have got scratched and torn a bit, but here I am, and now, my good fellows, attention, and take care!
I think he would have silently choked to death just then, for my sake; and it was not until I had reached my room again, and threw myself panting on the sofa, that I saw how near strangulation he had been. He gulped once or twice apologetically, and then walked to the corner of his own accord, and rolled himself up like an immense sugarplum, sweating remorse and treacle at every pore.
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