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Updated: June 28, 2025
I wa'n't long there 'fore a big cock com a floppin' up, and lit on the karkidge. I grabbed him by the leg. The cussed thing wur nearly as stinkin' as the other; but it wur die dog, buzzard, or buffler; so I skinned the buzzard." "And ate it?" inquired one. "No-o" slowly drawled the trapper, "it ate me." A general laugh followed this remark.
Now, I've noticed when I'm cookin' buffler steaks an' deer meat an' wild turkey an' nice, juicy fish, an' cookin' mebbe better than anybody else in all Ameriky kin, how you, Shif'less Sol Hyde, turn plum' green with envy an' begin makin' disrespeckful remarks 'bout me, Jim Hart, who hez too lofty an' noble a natur ever to try to pull you down, poor an' ornery scrub that you be."
You dah to say they shayn't and I'll comb you with this varmint from head to foot! The tiger and the buffler SHELL lay down together. They SHELL! Now, you, Joe! Behold! I am here to see it done. The lion and the buffler SHELL lay down together!" Mouthing these words again and again, the parson forced his way through the surge in the wake of the buffalo.
"I'm an eddycated man, Jim Hart, eddycated in the ways o' the woods, an' one o' the fust things you do when you're gittin' that sort o' an eddication is to learn to use your eyes. I hev used mine, an' jest before we set down here I noticed the fresh trail o' buffler runnin' off to the right, 'bout a dozen, I'd say, an' jest ez shore ez I'm here they're not more'n a mile away.
Don't you think, Henry, that ef Jim Hart had been thar to cook wild turkey an' venison an' buffler meat for all them old Romans an' Egyptians, an' sech like, with the cur'ous appetites, always lookin' fur new dishes, they'd have rested satisfied, an' wouldn't hev decayed down to nothin'? 'Pears strange to me why they'd keep on lookin' roun' fur hummin' bird tongues an' them other queer things when they could have had nice cow buffler steak every day o' thar lives."
"Go on you, Sol Hyde," said Long Jim Hart, rebukingly, "an' kill that buffler. Don't you know that when you kill it I'll hev to cook it, an' I ain't complainin'?" "Quit braggin' on yourse'f, Jim Hart. You ain't complainin', 'cause you ain't got sense 'nuff to complain. You're plum' sunk so deep in sloth an' ig'rance that you're jest satisfied with anythin', no matter how bad it is.
I then swum round and pushed that 'ere thing afore me, until I had got it high and dry on a sandbar. 'Twur like to melt when I pulled it out o' the water. 'Twa'n't eatable nohow. I see the buzzards still flying about, and fresh ones comin', an' I took a idee that I might get some, so I laid down close to the buffler, and played possum.
"Couldn't save the obstinate beasts, master," he said quietly; "they were worse than buffler." "But how did you manage to escape?" cried the Doctor and Bart in a breath. "Oh! when I see it was all over, I just crept under a bush, and waited till the Indian dogs had gone." "Chief Joses too wise for Apache dog," said the Beaver, with a calm smile. "Beaver-with-Sharp-Teeth told young chief Bart so."
"It'll niver do to return to Master Harvey in this shtyle. There'd be a committee of investigation appointed on the spot, an' I shouldn't pass muster excipt for a whisky-barrel, och hone!" "Little sick soon be well then shoot." "I wonder now whether I could howld me gun straight enough to drop a buffler at ten paces. There sits a bird in that tree that is grinning at me.
Why, I could eat a hull big buffler by myself, an' ef he wuzn't cooked I could eat him alive, an' on the hoof too, so I could!" Tom Ross continued to laugh silently with his eyes and lips. "What are we to do?" asked Paul in dismay. "If we were to find game we wouldn't dare fire at it with the Indians perhaps so near." "True," said Tom Ross.
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