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Updated: May 13, 2025
"I believe I was the most unfortunate devil of a boy that ever walked," he began, when he was seated. "My mother was and is an actress, and a tiptop crack in her profession. One of the first things I remember is sitting on the floor in the corner of a room where there was a big glass, and she flaring away before it, attitudinizing and spouting Shakespeare like mad.
Mary Jane she set at the head of the table, with Susan alongside of her, and said how bad the biscuits was, and how mean the preserves was, and how ornery and tough the fried chickens was and all that kind of rot, the way women always do for to force out compliments; and the people all knowed everything was tiptop, and said so said "How DO you get biscuits to brown so nice?" and "Where, for the land's sake, DID you get these amaz'n pickles?" and all that kind of humbug talky-talk, just the way people always does at a supper, you know.
"Wal," he went on, "I don't guess I ken make folks talk if they don't notion it. But I want to say right here I bought ha'f o' Zip's claim fer good dollars, an' I'm goin' to pay Sandy Joyce a tiptop wage fer workin' my share. An'" he paused and glanced swiftly and defiantly at the faces which were no longer smiling "an' I want to say I bought the richest lay-out in this bum camp.
She explained to him how an accomplished and experienced woman could help a man to gain admittance into the tiptop circles, which, according to her, were just thirsting for him.
"A really nice pudding" was what we justly desired, since the Neapolitan genius for sweets is well known. Mr. James threw out half phrases pursued them improved upon them withdrew them till finally he rushed upon the magnificent bathos "un dolce come si deve!" which has ever since been the word with us for the tiptop thing. With the country people he was simplicity and friendship itself.
We might take the children over to Purity Village. I think likely the Shakers would take 'em. They like to get young folks and break 'em into their doctrines." "Tim 'd make a tiptop Shaker," laughed Samantha. "He'd be an Elder afore he was twenty-one.
And her mother said to him to let that be a warning to him for the rest of his days and he couldn't even go to the funeral on account of the gout and she had to go into town to bring him the letters and samples from his office about Catesby's cork lino, artistic, standard designs, fit for a palace, gives tiptop wear and always bright and cheery in the home.
I was in tiptop shape when I sailed. All this come out on me afterward. You remember seem' me aloft, an' up to my neck in water. And I trimmed coal below, too. A sick man couldn't do it. And remember, sir, you'll have to testify to how I did my duty at the beginning before I took down." "I'll bet with you myself if you think I'm goin' to die," he called after me.
"But he shore dresses y' tiptop!" was the next assertion. At that, some inkling of the other's real meaning came to Johnnie. He tried, but in vain, to catch that single eye. But even in the half light it was busy taking in every detail of Big Tom's shirt and trousers. "Y' y' think so?" Johnnie ventured, ready to laugh. "Think so!" cried the one-eyed man, spiritedly.
The cleaning and arranging was finished at last, and everything within the house was as neat and orderly as Aunt Eunice and Adah could make it, even Aunt Chloe acknowledging that "things was tiptop," but said, "it was no use settin' 'em to rights when Mas'r Hugh done onsot 'em so quick;" but Hugh promised to do better.
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