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Updated: June 29, 2025
I had been corralin' a heap o' city langwidge since I had been cooped up with Locals an' Hammy, but my heart failed me. I knew I was still some shy on society manners; but I also knew 'at the' was a heap o' bluffin' goin' on, so I stuck up my bet an' called. "Artie," I sez, holdin' out my hand, "you 're the first lord my eyes has ever feasted on; but I like you you're game.
He had stopped beside two Kaskaskia warriors in scarlet blankets who stood at the corner, watching with silent contempt the antics of the French inhabitants. Now and again one or the other gave a grunt and wrapped his blanket more tightly about him. "Umrrhh!" said Terence. "Faith, I talk that langwidge mesilf when I have throuble."
"I put one hand over the skipper's mouth fust, and then, finding that was no good, I put the other. It was no good wasting bad langwidge on 'Arry. "I pacified the skipper at last, and arter 'Arry 'ad swore true 'e'd go when 'e'd got the money, the skipper rushed round to try and raise it.
"Well! Gee Gosh! If you could hear the langwidge he uses when Neeter puts him to bed and he don't want to go! Why, yesterday he was on the floor playin' with Chance and Chance got tired of it and lays down to snooze. Billy hitches along up to Chance, and Bim! he punches Chance on the nose. Made him sneeze, too! Why, that kid ain't afraid of nothin' jest like his pa.
"Funny now, I speck," said the old man, "but 'tweren't funny in dem days, en 'twouldn't be funny now ef folks know'd much 'bout de Bull-frog langwidge ez dey useter. Dat's w'at."
The old man give me several specimens of langwidge unwashed and uncombed when I told him Wolf and York was outlaws and train-robbers. Didn't believe a word of it, he said. 'Twas just like the fool officers to jump an innocent party. I told Jay to keep his shirt on he could turn his wolf lose when they framed up that he was in it. Well, sir!
After a while they grew more resigned in their langwidge; but after we had driven down to town without finding him, Hammy sez, "In sooth 't is bitter truth that all the world's a stage; yet Fate, however cruel, never decreed that I should play the second season, as servile server to a worn out mine my health is all right again, an' I'm goin' back where a feller gets paid decent wages for makin' a fool of himself."
Now I don't want none o' your langwidge, and I don't want you follering me like a couple o' cats arter a meat-barrer. I shall be 'aving a cup o' tea at Brown's coffee-shop by and by, and if you're there at five sharp I'll see wot I can do for you. Wot did you call me? "Ginger told 'im three times, and then Peter Russet dragged 'im away.
He's preparing a quare bed of repentance for himself, so he is, the langwidge he's usin' about her all over the house. By-and-by he'll be rememberin' she's Sir Gerald's widdy, and'll be askin' me ashamed-like, 'I hope I didn't say too much about her Ladyship in my timper, Pat. She's a tryin' woman, a very tryin' woman.
"An' your langwidge is that bad I'll need to git around a Bible-class ag'in to disinfect my ears." "You sure will," agreed Toby, with one of his fatuous grins. "I never see any feller who needed disinfectin' more." Then he turned upon the evil-faced choreman and added his morsel of admonition.
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