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Poker, that's a good soul, now do, Squire, look at the sarvants. Do you hear that feller, a blowin' and a wheesin' like a hoss that's got the heaves? Well he is so fat and lazy, and murders beef and beer so, he has got the assmy, and walkin' puts him out o' breath aint it beautiful! Faithful old sarvant that, so attached to the family! which means the family prog.
"'By this an' by that, says the gentleman, 'tare an' ages! says he, 'thunder an' turf! he says, 'what in the world is the matter wid me big toe? "Well, the misthress comes runnin' down in a great state. "'Ou-ou-ough! says the masther, 'maybe it would do me good. Fetch it there, quick, he says to the sarvants, 'or I'll be the death o' some of yez!
Oh, you needn't stare! it's well known by thim that has as much sinse as you no, not so much as you'd carry on the point o' this knittin'-needle. Well, sure the housekeeper an' the two sarvants wondhered faix, they couldn't do less an' took it into their heads to watch him closely; an' what do you think blessed be all the saints above! what do you think they seen?"
It's monstrous onconvenient and ridikilous to be a jumpin' up for everlastinly that way; you can't sit still one blessed minit. "'We think it pleasant, said he, 'sometimes to dispense with their attendance. That's the right time to have sarvants to tend on you. "'What an idea! said he, and he puckered up his pictur, and the way he stared was a caution to an owl.
Rondeau instantly started for home, where he was greeted by Aunt Dilsey with a torrent of abuse, that good lady rating him soundly for being gone too long. "Warn’t he ’shamed to be foolin’ away his time? ’Twan’t his time nuther, ’twas marster’s time. Was that ar fulfillin’ of Scripter, which says, ’we must be all eye sarvants,’ which means ye must all keep clus where yer marsters can see you?"
They have a sartificate of character, these consarvitives, in having the support of the Tories; but that don't quite satisfy me. It may, perhaps, mean no more than this, arter all they are the best sarvants we have; but not as good as we want. However, I shall know more about it soon; and when I do, I will give you my opinion candidly.
He's an old bachelder, I reckon, that is, he keeps mighty spruce, but I reckon he's hard on to thirty. Emily's got a cousin that works for some o' them big folks down to Providence, and she's heered all about him, this red-haired one, and how he keeps a big house down thar', and sarvants enough, massy! and half the time he's hither and yon, and a throwin' out money like water.
Cuss them sarvants! it takes seven or eight of 'em to carry a man's name up stairs, they are so awful lazy, and so shockin' full of porter.
"Sarvants keep goin' round and round in a ring, slow, but sartain, and for ever, like the arms of a great big windmill, shovin' dish after dish, in dum show, afore your nose, for you to see how you like the flavour; when your glass is empty it's filled; when your eyes is off your plate, it's off too, afore you can say Nick Biddle. "Folks speak low here; steam is valuable, and noise onpolite.
'Tis the devil's devices, sir, against you, because you'm going against his sarvants the Pope of Room and the Spaniard; and you'll be Pixy-led, sure as life, and locked into a bog, you will, and see mun vanish away to fire and brimstone, like a jack-o'-lantern. Oh, have a care, then, have a care!"
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