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Updated: June 11, 2025
"Thrue, boy, the Baron Fagoni feeds well, bekase he's the cock o' the roost; but the poor Naygurs are not overly well fed, and the critters are up to their knees in wather all day, washing di'monds; so they suffer much from rheumatiz and colds. Och, but it's murther entirely; an' I've more than wance felt inclined to fill their pockets with di'monds and set them all free!
I asked, before he had time to ask me which "pop" I wanted. As I have said, his mouth was big, but I was almost aghast at the size to which it opened, before he was able to say, "Murther and ages! Was ye there lately? Did ye know her?" "Yes; I know her." "And why would ye be standing there with the cold pop, when there's something better within? Come in, me boy.
Mac. Which youngest? Hen. I, my Lord. Enter Jaylour. Mac. You charge this Gentleman, your elder brother, With murther of your father. Hen. Which I can prove. Mac. And hither flyes a ravisht Ladyes voice To charge you with a Rape; the wronged Daughter Of this most noble Gentleman. Hen. Let them prove that Mac. These accusations & the proofes shall meete Here face to face, in th' afternoone.
"He looks black enough to murther the poor young spalpeen," muttered the Irishman, as he hastened to do his errand, remembering now with trepidation that, though he had escaped from his master, the big, red-faced, stout-armed wife of his bosom was still to be propitiated after his late prowlings.
"Oh, this bye is the son of a praste," screamed the loveliest girl in all Missouri. "Indade, I misthrusted the little scamp. Och! oh and where is me brooch? I thought all the time the little divvil was afther something. Thieves! Murther!" Confusion in pandemonium now reigned supreme. For one precious moment the air seemed full of long-legged stockings and delicate hands and purses.
And by a strange Providence an Indian was found, that by Accident was standing unseen upon a Hill, had seen them murther the said Sausaman, but durst never reveal it for Fear of losing his own Life likewise, until he was called to the Court at Plimouth, or before the Governour, where he plainly confessed what he had seen. This was done at Plimouth Court, held in June, 1674.
Thin, right smash into our rear, came fwhat was left av the Jock Elliotts wid four pipers an' not half a kilt among thim, playin' for the dear life, an' swingin' their rumps like buck rabbits, an' a native rig'mint shrieking blue murther. Ye niver heard the like. There was men cryin' like women that did an' faith I do not blame thim.
The husband again became composed and related what is already familiar to the reader. At its close, Teddy dashed into the house and brought out his rifle. "I'll murther that At-to-uck, be me sowl, and then I'll murther that haythen assassinator, an' iverybody that gits in me way. Be the powers of the saints and divils, but I'll murther somebody. May the divil roast me if I "
'Whist, you natural! says the cat that was making the speech, 'what do you think we care for your Owney, or Owney-na-peak? 'Murther, murther! thinks Owney to himself, 'did anybody ever hear the aiqual of this? 'Well, gentlemen, says the cat again, 'what I have to say is this. The king was last week struck with blindness, and you all know well, how and by what means any blindness may be cured.
If you'd only given him wan shot he might have stud it, but two was too much for him. But plaise, Mister Slagg, don't fire at monkeys again. I niver do it mesilf, an' can't stand by to see it. It's so like murther, an' the only wan I iver shot in me life was so like me own owld gran'mother that I've niver quite got over it."
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