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Updated: June 28, 2025
It was a bright, sunny half-holiday, when I was longing to be off fishing, but with Humpty Dumpty incomplete there was no fishing for me, especially as Aunt Sophia had been asking how soon her pet was to be finished. "Come along, Nat," said Uncle Joseph, "and we'll soon finish it." I smiled rather sadly, for I did not feel at all sanguine.
A second question is equally essential to any really permanent settlement, and it is one upon which these eloquent but unsatisfactory mouthpieces of ours turn their backs with an equal resolution, and that is the fate of the Ottoman Empire. What in plain English are we up to there? Whatever happens, that Humpty Dumpty cannot be put back as it was before the war.
If I am asked what would become of accused persons if they had to prove their innocence to the lawyers before making a defense in court, I reply that I do not know; and in my turn I ask: What would become of Humpty Dumpty if all the king's horses and all the king's men were an isosceles triangle?
'As to poetry, you know, said Humpty Dumpty, stretching out one of his great hands, 'I can repeat poetry as well as other folk, if it comes to that 'Oh, it needn't come to that! Alice hastily said, hoping to keep him from beginning. 'The piece I'm going to repeat, he went on without noticing her remark, 'was written entirely for your amusement.
Alice felt that in that case she really OUGHT to listen to it, so she sat down, and said 'Thank you' rather sadly. 'In winter, when the fields are white, I sing this song for your delight only I don't sing it, he added, as an explanation. 'I see you don't, said Alice. 'If you can SEE whether I'm singing or not, you've sharper eyes than most. Humpty Dumpty remarked severely. Alice was silent.
"Can we go out, mum?" asked Humpty. "There is no one to take you out, darling," said mummie thoughtfully; "but it is so nice and sunny now that I think you ought to go. It is too wet to play in the garden, and if you go alone you must promise to walk along the road to the end of the village, and straight back again.
"And now," cried Amy Colgate, throwing open her fur coat, revealing a dazzling gown of black and silver, "now for the fun! Mr. Footman, will you admit the messengers from Humpty Dumpty land?" In came four sprightly clowns, chalked and patched, clad in spots and spangles, dancing like mad and grinning from ear to ear.
Tom was almost directly beneath him now, walking, slipping, and scrambling to his feet again, while this grim personage looked down at him like Humpty Dumpty from his wall. The whole business was so utterly strange that he could hardly realize that he was standing, or trying to stand, waist deep, at the conning tower of a German submarine.
"Nan is ill with a cold in her head," he explained, "and mum has just made her go to bed and drink hot milk." "I often see ye passin'," said Poor Jane conversationally. "Yes," said Humpty, who was still holding his sister's hand tight, "we often come this way for a walk, and we always see you." "You always walk this way, don't you?" said Dumpty bravely, though she still trembled with fright.
They found a large cupboard, too, containing all sorts of beautiful clothes lovely velvet dresses, and robes of gold and silver. "How dark it is getting!" said Humpty presently; "why did you shut the door?" "I didn't shut the door," answered Dumpty; "I spect the wind did." They took a long time in exploring the cupboard. Suddenly Humpty cried, "We have forgotten Poor Jane's brother!"
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