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Updated: June 12, 2025
"You see, my dear, that after we had left that gaby, Galgenstein, ha, ha with a gag in his mouth, and twopence-halfpenny in his pocket, the honest Count was in the sorriest plight in the world; owing money here and there to tradesmen, a cool thousand to the Warwickshire Squire: and all this on eighty pounds a year!
Lindsay and Rhoda were penniless, Monica also had left her purse at the Vicarage. Irene and Meta mustered a shilling between them. Ralph had a sixpence, while the contents of Leonard's pockets proved to be exactly those of the traditional schoolboy's, twopence-halfpenny and an old knife. "I'm afraid it won't go very far," said Ralph. "We shall have to ask them to give us tick. Come along!
He reached out his hand as he spoke, and as the boat jarred violently against a small schooner, seized a rope which hung over the side, and, swaying to and fro, fumbled in his pocket for the fare. "Steady, old boy," said the waterman affectionately. He had just received twopence-halfpenny and a shilling by mistake for threepence. "Easy up the side.
"If only I hadn't bought Maria's collar last Monday, I could have got you a bottle easily," cried Jerry, in great distress. "I've only twopence-halfpenny left, but do take it. Oh, you poor little girl, I am so sorry for you!" Bobbie felt very guilty, and his money seemed to weigh upon him like lead.
The rent has been reduced, but not enough to compensate the drop in the prices of produce. Why, cattle have been fetching one-half what they fetched a short time ago. Potatoes are twopence-halfpenny a stone! Did you ever hear of such a thing? Yes, it enables the people to live very cheaply, but how about the growers?
While the boy goes, you pay him about sevenpence an hour; while he waits you pay him rather less than twopence-halfpenny an hour, and you can have his services for a whole day for about half a crown. But some of them will try to cheat you in places where foreigners are often met with, and will put a whole twopence an hour on the regular price.
Preserve me from my own servants, and I will call myself rich on twopence-halfpenny. Cock. Well, well, we must be getting home; see, it is just dawn. The rest must wait for another day. Menippus and a Friend Me. Let me see, now. First stage, Earth to Moon, 350 miles. Second stage, up to the Sun, 500 leagues.
Now Nosey Browne and Jorrocks were old friends, and Nosey's affairs having gone crooked, why of course, like most men in a similar situation, he was all the better for it; and while his creditors were taking twopence-halfpenny in the pound, he was taking his diversion on his wife's property, which a sagacious old father-in-law had secured to the family in the event of such a contingency as a failure happening; so knowing Jorrock's propensity for sports, and being desirous of chatting over all his gallant doings with "The Surrey," shortly after the above-mentioned day he dispatched a "twopenny," offering him a day's shooting on his property in Surrey, adding, that he hoped he would dine with him after.
'My harpy, she remarked, alluding to her dressmaker,'would ruin you over them, of course. Your maid' the Leyburns possessed a remarkably clever one 'will make them divinely for twopence-halfpenny. Listen. Rose listened; her eye kindled; the maid was summoned; and the invitation accepted in Agnes's neatest hand.
His train was one which boasted a restaurant car, and Kew patronised this institution. But when he was in the middle of cold meat, he thought: "She is probably trying to live on twopence-halfpenny a week. Continual tripe and onions." So he refused pudding. The pudding, persistent as only a railway pudding can be, came back incredulously three times. But Kew pushed it away.
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