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Every morn during the heat of the summer months Appleboy would rouse Tunnygate or conversely Tunnygate would rouse Appleboy, and each in his own wobbly skiff would row out to the spot which seemed most propitious to the piscatorial art.
Then, without knowing why, for he had no formulated ideas as to the future, and probably only intended to try to scare Tunnygate with vague threats, Appleboy added: "I warn you not to go through that hedge again! Understand I warn you! And if you do I won't be responsible for the consequences!" He really didn't mean a thing by the words, and Tunnygate knew it.
For a while things went well enough; it takes ladies a few weeks to find out each other's weak points. But then the new Mrs. Tunnygate unexpectedly yet undeniably began to exhibit the serpent's tooth, the adder's tongue or the cloven hoof as the reader's literary traditions may lead him to prefer. For no obvious reason at all she conceived a violent hatred of Mrs.
"Every dog is entitled to one bite." "Now see here!" shouted Mr. Appleboy, coming out of the boathouse, where he was cleaning his morning's catch of perch, as his neighbor Mr. Tunnygate crashed through the hedge and cut across Appleboy's parched lawn to the beach. "See here, Tunnygate, I won't have you trespassing on my place! I've told you so at least a dozen times!
"Eh? Beg pardon, Your Honor, I mean " "I said: 'Don't do it again!" repeated the judge with a twinkle in his eye. Then lowering his voice he whispered: "You see I come from Livornia, and I've known Andrew for a long time." As Tutt guided the Appleboys out into the corridor the party came face to face with Mr. and Mrs. Tunnygate. "Huh!" sneered Tunnygate. "Huh!" retorted Appleboy.
You will no doubt be given an opportunity to testify as fully as you wish. That is all, sir, unless Mr. Tutt has some more questions." Tutt waved the witness from the stand contemptuously. "Well, I'd like a chance to testify!" shrilled Mrs. Tunnygate, rising in full panoply. "This way, madam," said the clerk, motioning her round the back of the jury box.
"I wasn't going to stay off where I had a right to go," asserted the witness. "And didn't you have warning that the dog was there?" "Look here!" suddenly burst out Tunnygate. "You can't hector me into anything. Appleboy never had a dog before. He got a dog just to sic him on me! He put up a sign 'Beware of the dog, but he knew that I'd think it was just a bluff.
"That," asserted Mr. Tutt, wiping his spectacles, "is a document worthy of preservation in the Congressional Library. Who drew it?" "Don't know," answered Tutt, "but whoever he was he was a humorist!" "It's no good. There isn't any allegation of scienter in it," affirmed Mr. Tutt. "What of it? It says he assaulted Tunnygate with a dangerous weapon.
Appleboy, a hatred that waxed all the more virulent on account of its object's innocently obstinate refusal to comprehend or recognize it. Indeed Mrs. Tunnygate found it so difficult to rouse Mrs. Appleboy into a state of belligerency sufficiently interesting that she soon transferred her energies to the more worthy task of making Appleboy's life a burden to him.
The bay shimmered in the broiling August sun and from a distant grove came the rattle and wheeze of locusts. Throggs Neck blazed in silence, and utterly silent was the house of Appleboy. With an air of bravado, but with a slightly accelerated heartbeat, Tunnygate thrust himself through the hole in the hedge and looked scornfully about the Appleboy lawn. A fierce rage worked through his veins.
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