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Updated: May 27, 2025
“Let me see the paper,” he said. After perusing it carefully for a little, he at last exclaimed in a tone of pleased discovery, “Hullo! I see that Lady Tulliwuddle is giving a reception and dance to-night. Most of the smart people in town just now are sure to be there. Would you care to go, Baron?” “Ach, surely,” said the Baron, eagerly. “Bot haf you been invited, Bonker?”
"Impossible!" "Quite simple, my dear fellow." "You you don't mean so?" "I do indeed." "Bot I shall not do it so vell as you." "A hundred times better." "Bot vy did you not say so before?" "Tulliwuddle might not have agreed with me." "Bot vould he like it now?" "It is not what he likes that we should consider, it's what is good for his interests." "Bot if I should fail?"
That's some consolation," he told himself; and without stopping to consider what would be the thoughts of his two obliging friends had they known he was seeking consolation in the society of one lady while they were arranging his nuptials with another, the baptismal Tulliwuddle drove back to the civilization of St. James's.
"I need no longer detain you, Lord Tulliwuddle," said the millionaire respectfully. "Ri, fetch your sister into her room. Your lordship, I have received an intellectual treat. I am very deeply gratified, sir. Allow me to conduct you to my daughter's boudoir."
The print which had inspired this enthusiasm depicted a historical but treasonable Lord Tulliwuddle preparing to have his head removed. Giving it a droll look, the Count observed "Well, if it inspires you, my dear Baron, that's all right. The omen would have struck me differently." "Ze omen!" murmured the Baron with a start.
Lord Tulliwuddle throws the 85-lb. hammer." The sixth event was nearly through, and there there evidently was the hammer in question being carried into the ring by no fewer than three stalwart Highlanders!
A mighty change came over the young man. He backed away from her, stammering hurriedly, "No yes I er why do you ask me that?" "Is there any other Lord Tulliwuddle?" she demanded breathlessly. He gave her one wild look, and then without so much as a farewell had turned and elbowed his way out of the room. "It's all up!" he said to himself.
"Lord Tulliwuddle, though I myself am only a stranger to your clan, your Highland heart will feel reassured when I mention that I belong through my grandmother to the kindred clan of the Mackays!" Lord Tulliwuddle, we welcome you!" "Put your hand on your heart and bow," whispered Bunker. "Keep on bowing and say nothing!"
"To Alicia!" cried the Baron hastily, draining his glass at the toast. "But some fun first!" "'I could not love thee, dear, so well, Loved I not humor more!" misquoted his host gaily. "Ah!" he added, "here comes Tulliwuddle." A young man, with his hands in his pockets and an eyeglass in his eye, strolled up to their table.
"Zat picture," said the Baron, nodding his head solemnly towards the portrait. "It is like ze Lord Tollyvoddle in ze print at ze hotel. I do believe he is ze same." "But I explained that he wasn't Tulliwuddle." "He is so like," repeated the Baron moodily. "He most be ze same." Bunker looked at it and shook his head. "A different man, I assure you." "Oh, ze devil!" replied the Baron.
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