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Updated: July 13, 2025
The Old Lady Ericson was in town with her auto. You might 'a' heard it snortin' anywhere about the post-office er the butcher shop." "Has she a motor?" asked the stranger absently. "'Deed an' she has! She runs into town every night about this time for her mail and meat for supper. Some folks say she's afraid her auto won't get exercise enough, but I say that's jealousy."
No Sam, said be, line the pocket well first, make that independent, and then the spirit will be like a horse turned out to grass in the spring, for the first time, he's all head and tail, a snortin and kickin and racin and carryin on like mad it soon gets independent too.
"I beg your pardon the sneeze ahem occurred when I wasn't expecting it. Ahem I wonder if you would do me a favour?" "I would not! Come snortin' in a guy's ear that-a-way and then askin' him would he do you a favour: You got a crust for fair!" Here, though, a natural curiosity triumphed over the rising tides of indignation. "Wot favour do you want, anyway?" he inquired shortly.
'What was that you was rearin' up an' snortin' over, Signals? he asked, carefully retrieving a cigarette stump from behind his ear and lighting up. The Signaller snorted again. 'Just 'ark at this, he said, unfolding his letter again. 'I'll just read this bit, an' then I'll tell you the sort of merry dance I've 'ad to-day. This is from an uncle o' mine in London.
He died with it stuck up, an' with more mortgages on the land he had left than you could shake a stick at. Plantin' tomatoes wrapped up in wrappin' paper ever heard of that? Father snorted when he first seen the Porchugeeze doin' it. An' he went on snortin'. Just the same they got bumper crops, an' father's house-patch of tomatoes was eaten by the black beetles.
Go on to bed, Susan, for if you don't I'm afeered that I'll have to say somethin' to hurt your feelin's, and then I'd worry about it all night." "Now Limuel, what is the use in snortin' round that way? Can't a body say a word?" "It do look like a body can," he rejoined; "and I'm afeered that a body will, and that's the reason I want you to go to bed." Old Lim sat down and the subject was dropped.
"Which he'd shore petered right thar, a prey to badgers, if it ain't for a cowpuncher he's one of Old Man Enright's riders who comes romancin' along an' is attracted to the spot by some cattle who's prancin' an' waltzin' about, sizin' Coyote up as he's layin' thar, an' snortin' an' curvin' their tails in wonder at the spectacle.
Bascom, he come out yesterday, and said he wouldn't stand for that steam roller snortin' back and forth in front of his house. But Jim Ferris told him he had his orders from Williamson, and he wasn't goin' to be held up by nobody until Williamson told him to stop. Jim isn't any kind of fool."
I spozed what if they should all git mad at him at one time how wuz he goin' to bear their 'leven rages flashin' from twenty-two eyes, snortin' from 'leven upturned noses, fallin' from 'leven angry voices, and the angry jesters from twenty-two scornful hands.
Spry? 'Dull, says she, 'very dull; there's no markets now, things don't fetch nothin'. Thinks I, some folks hadn't ought to complain of markets, for they don't raise nothin' to sell, but I didn't say so; FOR POVERTY IS KEEN ENOUGH, WITHOUT SHARPENING ITS EDGE BY POKIN' FUN AT IT. 'Potatoes, says I, 'will fetch a good price this fall, for it's a short crop in a general way; how's your'n? 'Grand, says she, 'as complete as you ever seed; our tops were small and didn't look well; but we have the handsomest bottoms, it's generally allowed, in all our place; you never seed the best of them, they are actilly worth lookin' at. I vow I had to take a chaw of tobaccy to keep from snortin' right out, it sounded so queer like.
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