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Updated: June 13, 2025
Fwhat d'you take me for?" she sez. "A woman," sez I; "the prettiest in barricks." "A wife," sez she; "the straightest in cantonmints!" 'Wid that I dropped my arm, fell back tu paces, an' saluted, for I saw that she mint fwhat she said. 'Then you know something that some men would give a good deal to be certain of. How could you tell? I demanded in the interests of Science.
I wonder now in thim days that my ears did not grow a yard on me head wid list'nin'. But I looked straight forninst me an' hauled up this an' dragged down that, such as was my duty, an' the orf'cers' ladies sez one to another, thinkin' I was out av listen-reach: 'Fwhat an obligin' young man is this Corp'ril Mulvaney! I was a Corp'ril then.
He luks over some papers an' sez he: 'A change an' a rist is fwhat yu' need, Sarjint Guy. There's a dhraft leavin' next week for Herschell Island I think I will mark yu up fur ut. "'Herschell Island? sez pore Nobby, an' wid that he let's out a howl. "'Tut, tut! sez ould Knockemorf, who was wise tu th' man's throuble. 'Tis safer off there'll yu'll be, man, than here, I'm thinkin'.
I should ha' found the break av ut in the eyes av the holes, else, he sez. "'Sargint, sez I, 'fwhat wud your life ha' been worth av the breech-pin had been in place, for, on my sowl, my life wud be worth just as much to me av I tould you whether ut was or was not. Be thankful the bullet was not there, I sez.
Du fwhat we cud, we cud not make some av th' silly fules kape back clear av th' danger-zone wimmin an' all, bedad! "By and by, a section av the wall tumbles an' quite a bunch av people got badly hurt Nobby amongst thim. We dhragged thim out as quick as we cud an' laid them forninst th' wall av a buildin' near-by awaithin' some stretcher-bearers.
He is baskin' in Purgathory this tide, but I wish he cud hear that, whin he stud lookin' down the room an' the bhoys shivered before the oi av him, I knew him for a brave man an' I liked him so. "'Fwhat will I do? sez O'Hara agin, an' we heard the voice av a woman low an' sof' in the veranda. 'Twas Slimmy's wife, come over at the shot, sittin' on wan av the benches an' scarce able to walk.
"On'y try me!" said Ortheris, jumping to his feet as if he had been stung. Mulvaney jumped too. "Fwhat are you going to do?" said he. "Help Ortheris down to Bombay or Karachi, whichever he likes. You can report that he separated from you before tiffin, and left his gun on the bank here!" "I'm to report that am I?" said Mulvaney, slowly. "Very well.
I'll pechy come an' bring you sart, along with me, you maraudin'"-niver mind fwhat I called her. 'Thin I wint for the Gaff, an' by the special ordher av Providence, for I was doin' a good work you will ondersthand, Dennis's springs hild toight. "Now, whin the Capt'n goes for that kit," thinks I, "he'll be throubled."
"I wint up to the man in the veranda, manin', as sure as I sit, to knock the life out av him. He slipped into the open. 'Fwhat are you doin' philanderin' about here, ye scum av the gutter? sez I polite, to give him his warnin', for I wanted him ready. "He niver lifted his head, but sez, all mournful an' melancolius, as if he thought I wud be sorry for him: 'I can't find her, sez he.
Double! sez Crook. 'Blow, child, blow for the honor av the British Arrmy! "That bhoy blew like a typhoon, an' the Tyrone an' we opined out as the Paythans broke, an' I saw that fwhat had gone before wud be kissin' an' huggin' to fwhat was to come. We'd dhruv thim into a broad part av the gut whin they gave, an' thin we opined out an' fair danced down the valley, dhrivin' thim before us.
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