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Updated: May 25, 2025
You take my advice, get married and have a boy of your own. Nothin' like one for solid comfort." The train was coming and they went out to meet it. The only passenger to alight was Mr. Barzilla Wingate, whose arrival had been foretold by Bailey Stitt the previous evening. Barzilla was part owner of a good-sized summer hotel at Wellmouth Neck. He and the depot master were old friends.
"Can't you get," says she, "two or three delightful, queer, old 'longshore characters to be at work 'round the hotel? It'll give such a touch of local color," she says. So out comes Peter with the letter. "Barzilla," he says to me, "I want some characters. Know anybody that's a character?" "Well," says I, "there's Nate Slocum over to Orham. He'd steal anything that wa'n't spiked down.
I don't know nothin' about his spunk, but I do know there's a woman with him. 'Tain't likely he'll want to race you when he's got a passenger aboard. "'Oh, I don't know! says he. 'I've got you, Barzilla; so 'twill be two and two. Let's heave alongside and see. "So he clucked to the Queen, and in a jiffy we was astern of t'other rig. Loveland looked back over his shoulder.
I'm Jimmie Kelly, says he." "Well, by mighty!" exclaimed the depot master, slapping his knee. "So HE was the Kelly man! Humph!" "Funny how it turned out, wa'n't it?" said Barzilla. "Course, Cap'n Jonadab was perfectly sat on spiritu'lism and signs and omens and such after that. He's had his fortune told no less'n eight times sence, and, nigh's I can find out, each time it's different.
And I hadn't been second mate in my time for nothin'. "'Take your hands off me! yells the Cap'n. 'I come in here to find a man I'm lookin' for, James Kelly it was, and You would, would you! Stand by, Barzilla! "I stood by. Rubber Collar got one from me that made him remember home and mother, I'll bet. Anyhow, my knuckles ached for two days afterwards. And Jonadab was just as busy.
We run alongside the wharf just as Booth Hank climbed over the stringpiece. "Get after him, Barzilla!" hollers Cap'n Jonadab. "I'll make her fast." Well, I hadn't took more'n three steps when I see 'twas goin' to be a long chase. Montague unfurled them thin legs of his and got over the ground something wonderful. All you could see was a pile of dust and coat tails flapping.
I watched this performance for a spell, waiting for him to say something, but he didn't, so I hailed, kind of sarcastic, and says: "What you doing playing solitaire? Which hand's ahead?" He kind of woke up then, and passes the envelope over to me. "Barzilla," he says, "what in time do you s'pose that is?"
The depot master came out of the ticket office. "Hello, boys!" he said shortly. "Hello, Sol!" hailed Stitt. "Barzilla and me have come to shed the farewell tear. As hirelin's of soulless corporations, meanin' the Old Home House at Wellmouth and the Ocean House at Orham, we've engaged all the shellfish along-shore and are goin' to clear out."
'I've got some stock in the railroad and that'll give me a pass fur's Fall River. And we can take a lunch to eat on the boat. And a stateroom's a dollar; that's fifty cents apiece. And my daughter's goin' to Denboro on a visit next week, so I'd have to pay board if I stayed to home. Come on, Barzilla! don't be so tight with your money.
"I said and I say again," protested Barzilla, "that I knew a case at our hotel of a servant girl named Effie, and she " "Oh, Heavens to Betsy! Here he goes again, I steered him in here on purpose, Sol, so's he'd get off that subject." "You never neither. You said " The depot master held up his hand. "Don't both talk at once," he commanded. "Set down and be peaceful, can't you. That's right.
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