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Updated: June 26, 2025
Now don't talk. If I keep very quiet for a while, this darkness will lift. It seems just on the point of breaking. H'sh! Dick knit his brows and stared desperately in front of him. The night air was chilling Torpenhow's toes. 'Can you stay like that a minute? he said. 'I'll get my dressing-gown and some slippers.
There's a row somewhere, and I'm out of it! The Nilghai commanded silence in vain. 'That's for my sake, Dick said bitterly. 'The birds are getting ready to fly, and they wouldn't tell me. I can hear Morten-Sutherland and Mackaye. Half the War Correspondents in London are there; and I'm out of it. He stumbled across the landing and plunged into Torpenhow's room.
They heard rapping at Torpenhow's door. 'That's some ruffian come up for a drink, said Torpenhow; and he raised his voice cheerily. There entered no one more ruffianly than a portly middle-aged gentleman in a satin-faced frockcoat. His lips were parted and pale, and there were deep pouches under the eyes. 'Weak heart, said Dick to himself, and, as he shook hands, 'very weak heart.
Then he went to bed with Dick, who counted every hour as it struck, and rose in the morning with a painfully clear head to receive Torpenhow's more formal congratulations and a particular account of the last night's revels. 'You aren't looking very happy for a newly accepted man, said Torpenhow. 'Never mind that it's my own affair, and I'm all right. Do you really go? 'Yes.
I'm blind, and the darkness will never go away. He made as if to leap from the bed, but Torpenhow's arms were round him, and Torpenhow's chin was on his shoulder, and his breath was squeezed out of him. He could only gasp, 'Blind! and wriggle feebly. 'Steady, Dickie, steady! said the deep voice in his ear, and the grip tightened.
Dick had instinctively sought running water for a comfort to his mood of mind. He was leaning over the Embankment wall, watching the rush of the Thames through the arches of Westminster Bridge. He began by thinking of Torpenhow's advice, but, as of custom, lost himself in the study of the faces flocking past. Some had death written on their features, and Dick marvelled that they could laugh.
You'll have to do without me in a little time, and you'll be glad I'm gone. Dick felt his way back to the big chair, and wondered what these things might mean. He did not wish to be tended by the housekeeper, and yet Torpenhow's constant tenderness jarred on him. He did not exactly know what he wanted.
'He's best left to hisself gentlemen always are when they're downhearted, said Mr. Beeton. Alf's rigorously limited powers of comprehending Torpenhow's special correspondence had waked the devil of unrest in Dick.
She explained her enduring hatred for Dick, and made it clear to him that she only sat for the sake of his money. 'And Mr. Torpenhow's ten times a better man than you, she concluded. 'He is. That's why he went away. I should have stayed and made love to you. The girl sat with her chin on her hand, scowling. 'To me! I'd like to catch you! If I wasn't afraid o' being hung I'd kill you.
'Well I am damned! exclaimed Dick, and returned to the chambers. Torpenhow and the Nilghai found him sitting on the steps to the studio door, repeating the phrase with an awful gravity. 'You'll be more damned when I'm done with you, said the Nilghai, upheaving his bulk from behind Torpenhow's shoulder and waving a sheaf of half-dry manuscript.
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