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Updated: June 5, 2025
"You're draggin' up a personal quarrel between you and Isaac Bolum, when we was discussin' the great problem that confronts every scholar in his day that of thrashin' the teacher." "It's a problem no scholar ever solved in the history of this walley, anyway," declared Elmer Spiker. "It ain't on the records," said Kallaberger. "There are le-gends," Isaac Bolum said.
The feeding motions of the eldest male of the Kimper collection of children stopped for an instant, and Master Tom leered at his father as he said, "Who's goin' to give the thrashin'?" "I am, Tom, your father is, an' don't make any mistake about it. He'll do it good an' brown, too, if he's to die used up right away afterwards.
"Well," said Christina, still doubtful of her part in the play, "if you're scared to come with me girls, you needn't, but I can't wait " "Look here, Trooper," cried Duke, "hop in there and drive them kids home. That car at McKenzies looks like a thrashin' machine an' that mare'll go clean crazy. Here Christine, here's Trooper, he'll go with you."
"It's in their faces drat 'em," insisted Uncle Jepson. He turned a vindictive eye on his niece. "If I'd have been fifty year younger I'd have give that Chavis a durn good thrashin' for sayin' what he did to you about pretty gals. Durn his hide, anyhow! That there Wil " "I felt that way myself, at first," smiled Ruth. "Afterwards, though, I felt differently.
"I s'pose that's all right," said the father; "but I want you to understan' one thing, an' understan' it so plain that you can't ever make any mistake about it afterwards. When I put any money into your hands to be used for anythin', it don't matter what, you must spend it for that, or you must get an awful thrashin' when you come back home again. Do you understan' me?"
But I spozed the men wuz off to the wars fightin' and gittin' killed to satisfy some other man's ambition, or settlin' some other men's quarrels. Josiah sez, smilin' happily, "Wouldn't it look uneek to see Philury mowin' in our oat and wheat fields, and you and Sister Bobbett rakin' after and loadin' grain and runnin' the thrashin' machine?"
"Which matters goes on good enough ontil mebby it's the eighth time I'm thar. I remembers the night all perfect. Me an' the girl sets up awhile, an' then I quits her an' turns in. I gets to sleep a-layin' along the aige of the bed, aimin' to keep 'way from the old man, who's snorln' an' thrashin' 'round an' takin' on over in the middle.
"One of the limbs was shakin' and thrashin'. I crawled out on it. I guess it was kind o' crazy me, but I was goin' to find out what was what if I broke my neck. There was a rope tied to it, and some big thing up above pullin' and jerkin' at it, tryin' to get away. Pretty soon, Mr. and Mrs. Farley came almost under me.
"Lanky, m' boy," I said to him, "I'm goin' to hing m' hat on one text fur the space of a good thrashin'." "What is it?" asked the sailmaker. "'As much as lieth in ye, live peaceably wid all men. Now I have done that same, and bedad, I have done it to the limit and I'm goin' to jump into this physical continshun so that of out it I will bring pace!" "Ye're all wrong!" said the sailmaker.
"They'll never be lit again in this man's town," Conboy went on, "and I'm one that's glad to see 'em go. Some of these fellers around town was sayin' tonight that Ascalon will be dead in the shell inside of three weeks, but I can't see it that way. Settlers'll begin to come now, that hall of Peden's'll make a good implement store, plenty of room for thrashin' machines and harvesters.
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