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Updated: June 14, 2025
"Doctor," said Simmons, as Jack paid him his fare, with a small coin added to it, "I'm half afeard I've done some mischief. I've been turning it over and over in my head, and can't exactly see the rights of it. A gent, with a pen behind his ear, comes down, at that orfice in Gray's Inn Road, and takes my number. But after that he says a civil thing or two.
"Say," he said at last, clasping his hands about his knee, and holding the pipe between his teeth, "have ye seen that new feller up at the orfice. Mister Houston, they call him?" Jack replied, very indifferently, that he had seen him once or twice.
Sum wanted post orfices, sum wanted collectorships, sum wantid furrin missions, and all wanted sumthin. I thought Old Abe would go crazy. He hadn't more than had time to shake hands with 'em, before another tremenjis crowd cum porein onto his premises. His house and dooryard was now perfeckly overflowed with orfice seekers, all clameruss for a immejit interview with with Old Abe.
"Blowed if I'm going to wait no longer," says the giant, licking his coarse blue lips. "'Ere we've been bluffed off day arter day, and kep' dancin' round the Dandy's wench like a parcel o' dogs. The fever's aboard, and we've got all ready. What's the use o' waitin'? Orfice, or no orfice, I'm for bizness at once!
I come quiet, didn't I? All the same for that, we 'adn't ought to take up your time this way, sir; but if it so 'appened you could find time to step round to the Company orfice in the morning and tell Mr Timms what you seen for yourself, we should lay under a very 'igh obligation to you for the trouble.
They slunked out of site to onct. There4, havin no politics, I made bold to visit Old Abe at his humstid in Springfield. I found the old feller in his parler, surrounded by a perfeck swarm of orfice seekers. Knowin he had been capting of a flat boat on the roarin Mississippy I thought I'd address him in sailor lingo, so sez I, "Old Abe, ahoy!
'I like him so much, I called out, as I clung to the saddle, 'that I want to know if you're at all inclined to part with him? Here Brutus became calm and attentive. 'Would you be inclined to make me a orfer for him, sir? 'Yes, I said faintly. 'About how much would he be? 'You step into my orfice here, sir, said he, 'and we'll talk it over.
And I wos, though she swore awful, saying she wanted gin an' jellies, an' could 'ave 'ad them, if that limb so did she name Tray, gentlemen both 'ad only 'anded to 'er the rich brooch he brought 'ome, just afore he went to earn a decent livin' at the lawr orfice, which 'is name is Pash " "Ha," said Hurd, thoughtfully, "I'll see the boy." "You can see him now," said Beecot, unexpectedly.
"But we can't stir without the girl," Gabbett said. "She's got to stall off the sentry and give us the orfice." The Crow's sallow features lighted up with a cunning smile. "Dear old caper merchant! Hear him talk!" said he, "as if he had the wisdom of Solomon in all his glory? Look here!" And he produced a dirty scrap of paper, over which his companions eagerly bent their heads.
"No, no, Jim it won't do," went on Ryan with bland decisiveness. "What you want is the two of them together, hey? on a nice dark stretch o' road, and old Orrick and a few good fellows along to help. You ain't the only one that's got it in for Stanhope, are you? An' you want Maginnis too, I guess? Come on in the orfice and talk about it over a seegar." Coligny Smith had told the truth.
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