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Updated: June 18, 2025
But what I feel, even what you feel, dearest, does not convince me that it is right. Until I am sure of that, of course I cannot do as you wish." Ellador, at times like this, always reminded me of Epictetus. "I will put you in prison!" said his master. "My body, you mean," replied Epictetus calmly. "I will cut your head off," said his master. "Have I said that my head could not be cut off?"
I tried my best to get Ellador's point of view, and naturally I tried to give her mine. Of course, what we, as men, wanted to make them see was that there were other, and as we proudly said "higher," uses in this relation than what Terry called "mere parentage." In the highest terms I knew I tried to explain this to Ellador.
Terry put in practice his pet conviction that a woman loves to be mastered, and by sheer brute force, in all the pride and passion of his intense masculinity, he tried to master this woman. It did not work. I got a pretty clear account of it later from Ellador, but what we heard at the time was the noise of a tremendous struggle, and Alima calling to Moadine.
Any number of them would have risked everything to go to the strange unknown lands and study; but we could take only one, and it had to be Ellador, naturally. We planned greatly about coming back, about establishing a connecting route by water; about penetrating those vast forests and civilizing or exterminating the dangerous savages. That is, we men talked of that last not with the women.
Poor old Terry! The things he'd learned didn't help him a heap in Herland. His idea was to take he thought that was the way. He thought, he honestly believed, that women like it. Not the women of Herland! Not Alima! I can see her now one day in the very first week of their marriage, setting forth to her day's work with long determined strides and hard-set mouth, and sticking close to Ellador.
So we grew together in friendship and happiness, Ellador and I, and so did Jeff and Celis. When it comes to Terry's part of it, and Alima's, I'm sorry and I'm ashamed. Of course I blame her somewhat. She wasn't as fine a psychologist as Ellador, and what's more, I think she had a far-descended atavistic trace of more marked femaleness, never apparent till Terry called it out.
I betook myself to Somel one day, carefully not taking Ellador. I did not mind seeming foolish to Somel she was used to it. "I want a chapter of explanation," I told her. "You know my stupidities by heart, and I do not want to show them to Ellador she thinks me so wise!" She smiled delightedly. "It is beautiful to see," she told me, "this new wonderful love between you.
There was no mystery in their methods. Being adapted to children it was at least comprehensible to adults. I spent many days with the little ones, sometimes with Ellador, sometimes without, and began to feel a crushing pity for my own childhood, and for all others that I had known.
There they were Celis, Alima, Ellador looking just as they had when we first saw them, standing a little way off from us, as interested, as mischievous as three schoolboys. "Hold on, Terry hold on!" I warned. "That's too easy. Look out for a trap." "Let us appeal to their kind hearts," Jeff urged. "I think they will help us. Perhaps they've got knives."
Even if it is bad in some ways?" Ellador was more than willing. But the nearer it came to our really going, and to my having to take her back to our "civilization," after the clean peace and beauty of theirs, the more I began to dread it, and the more I tried to explain. Of course I had been homesick at first, while we were prisoners, before I had Ellador.
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