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Updated: June 28, 2025
The rivals parted, peace once more reigned, and the company repaired to their respective beds. In the morning both Mr. Pott and Mr. Slurk were careful to continue their journey in separate coaches before the Pickwickians were stirring, whilst the spectators of the exciting scene went forward to London in their post-chaise a little later.
'If you can wade through a few sentences of malice, meanness, falsehood, perjury, treachery, and cant, said Slurk, handing the paper to Bob, 'you will, perhaps, be somewhat repaid by a laugh at the style of this ungrammatical twaddler. 'What's that you said, Sir? inquired Mr. Pott, looking up, trembling all over with passion. 'What's that to you, sir? replied Slurk.
'There, sir, said Pott, retreating from the stove, 'and that's the way I would serve the viper who produces it, if I were not, fortunately for him, restrained by the laws of my country. 'Serve him so, sir! cried Slurk, starting up. 'Those laws shall never be appealed to by him, sir, in such a case. Serve him so, sir! 'Hear! hear! said Bob Sawyer. 'Nothing can be fairer, observed Mr.
'Ungrammatical twaddler, was it, sir? said Pott. 'Yes, sir, it was, replied Slurk; 'and BLUE BORE, Sir, if you like that better; ha! ha! Mr. Pott retorted not a word at this jocose insult, but deliberately folded up his copy of the INDEPENDENT, flattened it carefully down, crushed it beneath his boot, spat upon it with great ceremony, and flung it into the fire.
'My name is Slurk, said the gentleman. The landlord slightly inclined his head. 'Slurk, sir, repeated the gentleman haughtily. 'Do you know me now, man? The landlord scratched his head, looked at the ceiling, and at the stranger, and smiled feebly. 'Do you know me, man? inquired the stranger angrily. The landlord made a strong effort, and at length replied, 'Well, Sir, I do not know you.
'What an impudent blunderer this fellow is, said Pott, turning from pink to crimson. 'Did you ever read any of this man's foolery, Sir? inquired Slurk of Bob Sawyer. 'Never, replied Bob; 'is it very bad? 'Oh, shocking! shocking! rejoined Slurk. 'Really! Dear me, this is too atrocious! exclaimed Pott, at this juncture; still feigning to be absorbed in his reading.
Then we have the extraordinary and realistic combat between Pott and Slurk in the kitchen of the "Saracen's Head," Towcester the one armed with a shovel, the other with a carpet bag and old Weller's chastisement of Stiggins.
Everybody had gone, and the house door was closed for the night. 'I will drink my rum-and-water, said Mr. Slurk, 'by the kitchen fire. So, gathering up his hat and newspaper, he stalked solemnly behind the landlord to that humble apartment, and throwing himself on a settle by the fireside, resumed his countenance of scorn, and began to read and drink in silent dignity.
Terrible emphasis was laid upon 'thing' and 'fellow'; and the faces of both editors began to glow with defiance. 'The ribaldry of this miserable man is despicably disgusting, said Pott, pretending to address Bob Sawyer, and scowling upon Slurk. Here, Mr. Slurk laughed very heartily, and folding up the paper so as to get at a fresh column conveniently, said, that the blockhead really amused him.
I alight wet and weary; no enthusiastic crowds press forward to greet their champion; the church bells are silent; the very name elicits no responsive feeling in their torpid bosoms. It is enough, said the agitated Mr. Slurk, pacing to and fro, 'to curdle the ink in one's pen, and induce one to abandon their cause for ever.
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