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Updated: June 23, 2025
"Good-morning ma'am," said Tom Smart, closing the door of the little parlour as the widow entered. "Good-morning, Sir," said the widow. "What will you take for breakfast, sir?" 'Tom was thinking how he should open the case, so he made no answer. "There's a very nice ham," said the widow, "and a beautiful cold larded fowl. Shall I send 'em in, Sir?" 'These words roused Tom from his reflections.
The Monomaniac again rose suddenly and, before his arm could be arrested, seized the fowl, larded as it was with accessories and dripping with gravy, and with all his force hurled it whole, with unerring aim, at the face of the supposed enemy.
In a dissertation attached to this twenty-sixth chapter a dissertation larded with illustrative extracts from Galen Celsus, Avicenna, Antonius Musa, Oribasius Salvus and about fifty others of the ancients who professed the healing art Monsignor Perrelli condenses for his readers the results of these classical experiments; he hands down the names of these springs and their manifold healing virtues.
He will potter about the farmyard the whole morning, perhaps turning up at home for a lunch of a slice of bread well larded. His little sister, not so old as himself, is there, already beginning her education in the cares of maternity, looking after the helpless baby that crawls over the wooden threshold of the door with bare head, despite the bitter cold.
"Roast or boiled, boiled, fried, or larded, all's one, all's none. We'll be mumbling shoe-leather soon." She sighed heavily at the thought, and moved slowly towards the door at the end of the hall beneath the gallery. Halfman, unheeding her, had turned to the table and was intently poring over the large map that lay there together with a loaded pistol. Thoroughgood gave orders to the men.
Then sometimes, as a dainty treat with which to finish his meal, a drover would call for a biscuit, large and hard, as broad as his hand, and, taking the tallow candle, proceed to drip the grease on it till it was well larded and soaked with the melted fat. At that date, before the Government stamp had been removed from newspapers, the roadside inn was the centre and focus of all intelligence.
You will find us all of a piece, and, having been accustomed to eat in saucers abroad, I am ashamed you should witness our larded capons, our mountains of beef, and oceans of brewis, as large as Highland hills and lochs; but you shall see better cheer to-morrow. Where lodge you? I will call for you.
I think I hear my reader exclaim. Yes, my friend, but that one was a marvel in its way. Chicken a l'espagnole, boiled, and buried in rice and tomatoes cooked whole a dish to be dreamed of and remembered in one's prayers and thanksgivings! After at least two helpings each to this chef-d'oeuvre, cold larded fillet and a meat pate were served with the salad.
They spoke on a variety of topics entirely foreign to the understanding of the half-affrighted and nervously-susceptible, but still resolute young girl who heard them; and nothing but her deep anxieties for one, whose own importance in her eyes at that moment she did not conjecture, could have sustained her while listening to a dialogue full of atrocious intention, and larded throughout with a familiar and sometimes foul phraseology that certainly was not altogether unseemly in such association.
His dishes were larded with odoriferous drugs, to that degree of expense that the cookery of one peacock and two pheasants amounted to a hundred ducats to dress them after their fashion; and when the carver came to cut them up, not only the dining-room, but all the apartments of his palace and the adjoining streets were filled with an aromatic vapour which did not presently vanish.
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