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In the old Jonesville meetin'-house now, when Elder Minkley is a-preachin' on Jonah and you know he trots him out a dozen times a year as a warnin' how you and I could lift up our heads and tost 'em, and how the necks of the Jonesvillians would be craned round to look at us we two, who had rid out in a whale we had been right there, and knew how it wuz."
Why, that fern wuz so large and beautiful, and attracted the envious and admirin' attention of so many Jonesvillians, that I had strong idees of takin' it to the Fair! Philury said she "hadn't a doubt of my gittin' the first prize medal on't." "Why," sez she, "it is as long as Ury's arm!" And it wuz.
Josiah said he wished he had thought on't, he would brung out a lot to sell, and he wuz all rousted up to try to make a bargain to supply one of these shops with rats and mice. Sez he: "It will be clear profit, Samantha, for I want to get rid on 'em, and all the Jonesvillians do, and if I can sell their carcasses I will throw in the hide and taller.
But they wuz married safe enough, and happy as two gambolin' lambs, so they say. Any way Submit looks ten years younger than she did, and I don't know but more. I don't know but she looks eleven or twelve years younger, and Samuel, why they say it is a perfect sight to see how happy he looks, and how he has renewed his age. The hull affair wuz very pleasin' to the Jonesvillians.
Josiah sez: "If Ury and I can turn the creek, Samantha, so it will run through the dooryard, you shall have a fountain right under your winder. Ury and I can rig up a statter for it out of stuns and mortar that will look first-rate. And I spoze," sez he, "the Jonesvillians would love to see my linimen sculped on it, and it might be a comfort to you, if I should be took first."
We talked about the splendor of the Fair and our own two healths, and the Jonesvillians, and then she sez: "I am so delighted to meet you, Josiah Allen's wife, for I know you will want to give to a noble cause I am workin' for, you and dear Mr. Allen. It is a cause that ort to be first in every feelin' heart, and I knew you'd give liberal."
But he didn't stay bowed down for any length of time: truly, men are constituted in such a way that mortification don't show on 'em for any length of time. But it made sights and sights of talk in Jonesville. The Jonesvillians made sights and sights of fun of him, poked fun at him, and snickered. I myself didn't say much: it hain't my way. I merely says this: says I,
Josiah wanted to know what etcetery meant, and I told him any other place we wanted to see which he said wuz reasonable, and he thought probable he should have to go to some shows on the Pike, he said he had met Uncle Sime Bentley the day before and they talked it over and decided that it seemed to be their duty as solid stiddy men to go to some of the worst shows, specially them that had pretty girls in 'em, so they could be convinced of their iniquity and warn the young Jonesvillians.
Agin he reminded me that it was told to me in confidence, and agin I want to say that it must be kep'. I thanked him for his kindness. He is a perfect gentleman; and he told me jest out of courtesy and politeness, and I know it. And I can be very polite too. And I am naturally one of the kindest-hearted of Jonesvillians.
I expect," he went on, "the road will be jest lined with Jonesvillians, and we'l see 'em hangin' over the orchard fence lookin' on and admirin' the beautiful statter, I think I can see her now, head up, tail out, mane a flutterin' you'll see, Samantha." "Oh, dear!" sez I, "I expect I will see more than I want to."
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