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Ethel told of Greesheimer, and then of coming back to Joe, of his poverty and of her nursing Susette, of dreaming of children, of falling in love, of marriage and the birth of her boy. "But all the time Amy had been there. Do you understand! Like a spirit, I mean! She had Joe first! She had shaped him!" "Yes "
No, I couldn't tell you in a week half about John, and he didn't want me to come. If I would come, then he wanted me to wait a few days until he finished a deal so he could bring me, but the minute I thought of it I was determined to come; you know how you get." "I know how badly you want to do a thing you have set your heart on," admitted Kate. "I had gone places with Susette in perfect comfort.
There under a great birch tree was a small wooden temple with a weather-beaten cross on top, and on a shelf inside, raised a little from the ground, stood a plaster cast of the Virgin. Jeanne sprinkled the white blossoms of the wild strawberry all around. Pani knelt and said a little prayer. Susette Mass ran to meet them. "Oh, how early you are!" she cried. "And how beautiful!
"Why didn't you marry him?" demanded Susette. "We quarreled," I answered sadly. "A terribly bitter quarrel. Oh, we were both so young and so foolish. It was my fault. I vexed Cecil by flirting with another man" wasn't I coming on! "and he was jealous and angry. He went out West and never came back. I have never seen him since, and I do not even know if he is alive.
And that would be a bitter self-punishment, for I love so to live if I can have my own life. Pani, why do men want one particular woman? Susette is blithe and merry, and Angelique is pretty as a flower, and when she spins she makes a picture like one the schoolmaster told me about. Oh, yes, there are plenty of girls who would be proud and glad to keep Pierre's house.
"The Chalet Cycle is the nearest," she volunteered, grasping the situation, and pointing to a path opening to the right as she spoke. "Is that where he has taken the child?" I asked, hurriedly. "No, Monsieur Susette has gone home. It is only a little way." I plunged on through the wet grass, my eyes on the opening through the trees, the rain pouring from my umbrella.
Crothers, when Amy died I was there I had just come to town. So I stayed with Joe to look after Susette. Then later on I began to feel that he was beginning to care for me. And I didn't like that on Amy's account, for I worshipped her then. So I broke away and took a job. . . . Oh, what in the world am I getting at!" "Don't try to think. Just tell me. You took a job. What was it?"
Her life had so completely changed. All those girl friends, so scattered; all those years, so far behind. It was like getting on a ship, she thought, to start across the ocean. "You can't get off, you must go across. Oh, Ethel Lanier, how happy you'll be." But the happiness seemed a long way off. How quiet it was. The nurse came in with Susette from the park.
"I could be but I won't!" she declared. "She had read Shaw. How funny! . . . I think it's a mighty big mistake to let young girls read Bernard Shaw. Susette certainly shan't!" Her lips compressed. In a moment she was frowning. "How easily Joe changed about from loving Amy to loving me. Here he lies asleep at my side. Where was he today?
From her room she heard him come in, and presently by the silence she knew he had settled himself to work. She barely slept, rose early and dressed herself with a resolute air. But already Joe had gone. It was a beautiful morning. With Susette she went to a florist's shop and had the child pick out some flowers. Then they went out to Amy's grave.
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