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Updated: July 6, 2025
"But, young man," said Mrs Gaff, who had listened to it all with an expression of imbecility on her good-looking face, "I never wrote a stroke in my life 'xcept once, when I tried to show my Billy how to do it, and only made a big blot on his copy, for which I gave him a slap on the face, poor ill-used boy."
"Well, sur, you have rendered we some help this hevenin', both in the way o' pickin' out the ball an' helpin' to break skulls as well as preventin' worse, so we can do no less than show 'ee the road; but hark 'ee, sur," here the man became very impressive, "ef you do chance to come across any of us in your travels, you had better not knaw us, 'xcept in an or'nary way, d'ye understand? an' us will do the same by thee."
"I can fix it, I most know; do get some paper, Joe, as quick as you can." "Don't know where there is any," said Joel, rummaging around; "it's all tore up; 'xcept the almanac; can't I take that?" "Oh dear, no!" cried Polly; "put it right back, Joe; I guess there's some in the wood-shed." "There isn't either," said little Davie, quickly; "Joel and I took it to make kites with."
"It's too late now," said Susan, not unkindly, "it's all over now all 'xcept the donation party, 'n' I don't see how you c'n do much there 'nless I bring over the butter 'n' mix it for you. But you mustn't interrupt me, Mrs. Lathrop, f'r if you do I never shall get through. "So the donation party was decided, 'n' Mrs.
Don't care for meself! Wouldn't give nuffin for meself! Only fit to tend missy Alice! Not fit for nuffin else, and now Alice gone whar' to, nobody nose an' nobody care, 'xcept Poopy, who's not worth a brass button!" Having given utterance to this last expression, which she had acquired from her friend Corrie, the poor girl began to howl in order to relieve her insupportable feelings.
It was "somethin' splendid" come! come! They drank pink lemonade and ate ice-cream cones. Elly Precious and Carruthers waved gay balloons. Evangeline chose a cane. "I need one. I'm so happy I tumble over! I never was so happy 'xcept when Elly Precious stopped havin' the measles. That was as splendid as this, but it wasn't as splendid splendid.
Wal, an' then you set yer thumb an' knit plain, 'xcept a seam-stetch each side uv yer thumb; an' you widden tew stetches, one each side, s'pose ye know heow ter widden? an' narry? ev'ry third reound, tell yer 've got nineteen stetches acrost yer thumb; then ye knit, 'ithout widdenin', a matter uv seven or eight reounds more, you listenin', Emerline?"
The pore Committee, as has to see to hewerythink, begins for to look jest a little pail and worryed and who can wunder at it, for I'm told as they is amost torn to peaces with applications for Tickets, tho they ony has two a-peace for their friends, and won't have one for theirselves, but will have to walk about all the time of the Lunch, with their long sticks of office, to see as ewerybody xcept theirselves is nice and cumferal, and got plenty to eat and drink.
About eight o'clock they halted for breakfast, which Larry O'Dowd prepared with his accustomed celerity, and assisted to consume with his wonted voracity. "There's nothin' like aitin' when yer hungry," observed Larry, with his mouth full. "'Xcept drinking when you're dry," said Stiff, ironically.
"That seems to be the idea of most men who come here," replied the trapper, "but it's not many that favour me with a visit." "Ha! vraiment, dat must be true," interposed the Canadian, "for no body vill com' here 'xcept them as do want hims legs broke."
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