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Updated: June 17, 2025
Figuratively, I was swept off my feet when a noble example of Southern womanhood put before my famished eyes the following items, to wit: About half a bushel of newly picked turnip greens, rearing islandwise above a sloshing sea of pot licker and supporting upon their fronded crests the boiled but impressive countenance of a hickory-cured shote, the whole being garnished with paired-off poached eggs like the topaz eyes of beauteous blond virgins turned soulfully heavenward; and set off by flankings of small piping-hot corn pones made with meal and water and salt and shortening, as Providence intended a proper corn pone should be made.
It calls attention to your best point. And if you keep on making as much noise in the world as you do now, maybe people won't notice that you're a bit undersized. You certainly sound as big as any little shote I ever saw or heard." So that was settled though Grunty Pig didn't care one way or another. He seemed to be interested in nothing but food.
"It was plaguy lucky for the doctor, I tell you, that he cut his stick as he did, and made himself scarce, for Alden was an ugly customer; he'd a gi'n him a proper scalding; he'd a taken the bristles off his hide, as clean as the skin of a spring shote of a pig killed at Christmas."
But them reptiles bein' in these parts makes me raither anxious about daddy. Did he say where he meant to hunt when he went off this morning?" "Yes; Leetil Tim says hims go for hunt near Lipstock Hill." "Just so; Lopstick Hill," returned Tim, correcting her with offhand gravity. "But me hears a shote an' a cry," said the girl, with a suddenly anxious look.
Thei taught them also to shote in the long bowe, to whorle with the sling: and to all these thynges, thei appoincted maisters, in soche maner, that after when thei were chosen for to go to the warre, thei were now with mynde and disposicion, souldiours.
I did all I could t' bring myself up to a p'int that I hoped I could reach you frum but 't warn't in me. I was 'bout Maud Grace's limit, as I say, but I didn't want t' own to it, an' now," he gulped bravely, "'t ain't much of an offerin'! I'm a poor shote, but if I could, I'd use my wuthless life fur her. It's 'bout all I kin do." "And it is the greatest thing on earth, Mark!"
With a demi-volt or backward somersault it hurled itself into the jungle whence it had come with a terrific roar of alarm, and its tail undoubtedly though not evidently between its legs! Heaving a deep, long-drawn sigh, the professor stood up and wiped his forehead. Then he listened intently. "A shote, if mine ears deceive me not!" he said, and listened again. He was right.
But somehow er 'nudder he could n' git away fum dat shote; w'en he tuk one step for'ards wid one foot, de yuther foot 'peared ter take two steps back'ards, en so he kep' nachly gittin' closeter en closeter ter de shote. It was de beatin'es' thing! De shote des 'peared ter cha'm Primus, en fus' thing you know Primus foun' hisse'f 'way up de road wid de shote on his back.
Nobody else attended to him, for Evans, the Mogul's engineer, a little cut about the head, but very angry, was exhibiting, by lantern-light, the mangled corpse of a slim blue pig. "T were n't even a decent-sized hog," he said. "'T were a shote." "Dangerousest beasts they are," said one of the crew. "Get under the pilot an' sort o' twiddle ye off the track, don't they?"
Under a vigorous vocal protest, he was then dragged to the back end of the Academy building, and plunged into a half hogshead of water. After his release, of course, the vacant space in the hogshead, caused by the displacing of the water, represented the actual size of the shote. In five minutes more, the cubic inches were obtained, and on the return of the Professor the answer was ready for him."
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