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Updated: June 9, 2025
I could rush at him and hug him... weep over him but I am afraid.... Oh, dear, he's so strange! He's talking kindly, but I'm afraid! Why, what am I afraid of?..." "Oh, Rodya, you wouldn't believe," she began suddenly, in haste to answer his words to her, "how unhappy Dounia and I were yesterday! Now that it's all over and done with and we are quite happy again I can tell you.
And indeed everything happening here seems somehow far away." He looked attentively at them. "You, now... I seem to be looking at you from a thousand miles away... but, goodness knows why we are talking of that! And what's the use of asking about it?" he added with annoyance, and biting his nails, fell into dreamy silence again. "What a wretched lodging you have, Rodya!
I tell you this simply to warn you, because I sincerely wish for your good..." Dounia did not reply. Her resolution had been taken. She was only awaiting the evening. "Then what is your decision, Rodya?" asked Pulcheria Alexandrovna, who was more uneasy than ever at the sudden, new businesslike tone of his talk. "What decision?"
To-morrow all this nonsense will be over... to-day he certainly did drive him away. That was so. And Luzhin got angry, too.... He made speeches here, wanted to show off his learning and he went out crest-fallen...." "Then it's true?" cried Pulcheria Alexandrovna. "Good-bye till to-morrow, brother," said Dounia compassionately "let us go, mother... Good-bye, Rodya."
Now he was glad to remember it, as a means of escape. "Listen, Dounia," he began, gravely and drily, "of course I beg your pardon for yesterday, but I consider it my duty to tell you again that I do not withdraw from my chief point. It is me or Luzhin. If I am a scoundrel, you must not be. One is enough. If you marry Luzhin, I cease at once to look on you as a sister." "Rodya, Rodya!
"Dounia has already decided, and I fully agree with her," Pulcheria Alexandrovna hastened to declare. "I decided to ask you, Rodya, to urge you not to fail to be with us at this interview," said Dounia. "Will you come?" "Yes." "I will ask you, too, to be with us at eight o'clock," she said, addressing Razumihin. "Mother, I am inviting him, too." "Quite right, Dounia.
I don't know how Rodya repeated them to you, perhaps he exaggerated." "He could not have exaggerated them, except at your instigation." "Pyotr Petrovitch," Pulcheria Alexandrovna declared with dignity, "the proof that Dounia and I did not take your words in a very bad sense is the fact that we are here." "Good, mother," said Dounia approvingly.
I am a luckless fool, I am unworthy of you and drunk... and I am ashamed.... I am not worthy to love you, but to do homage to you is the duty of every man who is not a perfect beast! And I've done homage.... Here are your lodgings, and for that alone Rodya was right in driving your Pyotr Petrovitch away.... How dare he! how dare he put you in such lodgings! It's a scandal!
The minute was so chosen that it was impossible to refuse, and the visitor squeezed his way through, hurrying and stumbling. Reaching the chair, he sat down, looking suspiciously at Razumihin. "No need to be nervous," the latter blurted out. "Rodya has been ill for the last five days and delirious for three, but now he is recovering and has got an appetite.
He attempted to smile, but it did not turn out a smile. "But who knows, perhaps it is the last time we shall see each other..." he let slip accidentally. It was what he was thinking, and it somehow was uttered aloud. "What is the matter with you?" cried his mother. "Where are you going, Rodya?" asked Dounia rather strangely.
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