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Updated: June 20, 2025
He gave her no opportunity of self-satisfaction, and she had to go on unaided, which she did in a vanquished tone, verging on tears: "I I think I must be equally honest with you as you have been with me. Perhaps you have seen what it is I want to say? that though I like Mr. Phillotson as a friend, I don't like him it is a torture to me to live with him as a husband!
Phillotson mounted beside his box of books and other impedimenta, and bade his friends good-bye. "I shan't forget you, Jude," he said, smiling, as the cart moved off. "Be a good boy, remember; and be kind to animals and birds, and read all you can. And if ever you come to Christminster remember you hunt me out for old acquaintance' sake."
Arabella smiled grimly as she resumed her way, and practised dimple-making all along the road from where the pollard willows begin to the old almshouses in the first street of the town. Meanwhile Phillotson ascended to Marygreen, and for the first time during a lengthened period he lived with a forward eye.
He preferred to dwell upon the recognized barriers between them. "Of course I know you don't care about me in any particular way," he sorrowed. "You ought not, and you are right. You belong to Mr. Phillotson. I suppose he has been to see you?" "Yes," she said shortly, her face changing a little. "Though I didn't ask him to come. You are glad, of course, that he has been!
It would be superfluous to say what his answer was; and how he thought what he would have done had he been free, which should have rendered a long residence with a female friend quite unnecessary for Sue. He felt he might have been pretty sure of his own victory if it had come to a conflict between Phillotson and himself for the possession of her.
"But since this painful matter has been opened up what really happened?" asked Phillotson, with the firmness of a man who felt that a sharp smart now was better than a long agony of suspense hereafter. "Cases arise, and this is one, when even ungenerous questions must be put to make false assumptions impossible, and to kill scandal."
At the end of the week, when Gillingham had gone back to his school near Shaston, Phillotson, as was his custom, went to Alfredston market; ruminating again on Arabella's intelligence as he walked down the long hill which he had known before Jude knew it, though his history had not beaten so intensely upon its incline.
"I've come, Richard," said she, looking pale and shaken, and sinking into a chair. "I cannot believe you forgive your wife!" "Everything, darling Susanna," said Phillotson. She started at the endearment, though it had been spoken advisedly without fervour. Then she nerved herself again. "My children are dead and it is right that they should be! I am glad almost. They were sin-begotten.
They had been schoolmates in boyhood, and fellow-students at Wintoncester Training College, many years before this time. "Glad to see you, Dick! But you don't look well? Nothing the matter?" Phillotson advanced without replying, and Gillingham closed the cupboard and pulled up beside his visitor. "Why you haven't been here let me see since you were married?
Now she thinks otherwise." The next morning came, and the self-sacrifice of the woman on the altar of what she was pleased to call her principles was acquiesced in by these two friends, each from his own point of view. Phillotson went across to the Widow Edlin's to fetch Sue a few minutes after eight o'clock.
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