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Updated: May 10, 2025
It was a blowy day. "Boys first!" commanded Joey. "Cos o' the petticuts." His speech was as lazy as his walk. He himself led the way, followed by Erwin and Marmaduke, and Laura, at Georgy's bidding, went next.
'What's more, says he, 'if the cap'n don't look sharp arter her the devil 'll have us all afore mornin. I tell ye, Sam, there's mischief under them petticuts. "'Why, what do ye think? says I. "'Think! I don't think, I knows! That 'are's no gal, nor widder neither, if my name's Tom Tooth-acre! Look at her walk; look at the way she turns on her heel I I've been a watchin' on her.
She sat and stared at the fire a few moments, and then began to speak in a low luxuriating voice. "I'd get a better room," she said, revelling. "There's one in the next 'ouse. I'd 'ave a few sticks o' furnisher in it a bed an' a chair or two. I'd get some warm petticuts an' a shawl an' a 'at with a ostrich feather in it. Polly an' me 'd live together. We'd 'ave fire an' grub every day.
"I'm the best judge of that," said the skipper sharply. "Fetch 'em up." "Well, to tell the truth, sir," said Ted, "I'm like the mate. I'm only a poor sailor-man, but I wouldn't lend my clothes to the Queen of England." "You fetch up them clothes," roared the skipper snatching off his bonnet and flinging it on the deck. "Fetch 'em up at once. D'ye think I'm going about in these petticuts?"
'Give her a whiff of fresh air with the bellows, Charley, said Mr. Dawkins; 'and you slap her hands, Fagin, while Bill undoes the petticuts. These united restoratives, administered with great energy: especially that department consigned to Master Bates, who appeared to consider his share in the proceedings, a piece of unexampled pleasantry: were not long in producing the desired effect.
Look here. Let's have harmony. I'm no hand at quarrelin', even among the men, let alone among the petticuts. Let's have harmony. The wench has got her letter back, and theer's no harm done. And if theer is, ye'd better fight it out betwigst ye." With this he turned his back and waddled a pace or two. Then he turned a laughing face upon them, moving slowly on his axis.
"'Well, he answers, 'my soul's pretty clean-swept, I think, save for one Bluebeard chamber in it that's been kep' locked ever so many years. It's nice and dirty by this time, I expect, he says. Then the grin comes on his mouth again. 'I'll open it some day, he says, 'and look. There's something in it about comparing me to a dancing dervish, with the wind in my petticuts.
"The fellers they was putty chopfallen, to be sure, and the one in women's clothes 'specially: 'cause when he was found out, he felt foolish enough in his petticuts; but they was both took to Boston, and given over as prisoners.
"'Why, what do you mean, Tom? said Mr. More, all in a blue maze. "'I mean, that 'are gal that's ben a switchin' her petticuts up and down our deck ain't no gal at all. That are's a British officer, Mr. More. You give my duty to the cap'n, and tell him to look into his wid-der's bandbox, and see what he'll find there.
Lord, Lord! We larfed nigh to split ourselves that arternoon; we was all makin' 'ay an' th' owld Squire was workin' wi' us for fun-like. 'I don't think much o' God, father! sez Miss Maryllia, runnin' up to 'im, an' liftin' up all 'er petticuts an' shewin' the purtiest little legs ye ever seed; 'Nurse sez He made the wopses! He-ee-ee-hor-hor- hor!"
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