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Updated: June 11, 2025


Oh, no! Flat life isn't the life for anybody, I say. Give me a good, first-class boarding-house. Am I not right, John?" "Yes, indeed," said Mr. Pedagog. "Every time. I lived in a flat once, and it was an awful nuisance.

"Green, gray, or pink," said the Idiot, "choose your color. It does not affect the fact that I was thinking about the Bibliomaniac and Mr. Pedagog. I have a great scheme in hand, which only requires capital and the assistance of those two gentlemen to launch it on the sea of prosperity. If any of you gentlemen want to get rich and die in comfort as the owner of your homes, now is your chance."

Has no vices, never pretends to be anything but a jackass, and most respectfully declines to be ridden by Tom, Dick, and Harry. I accept the suggestion of Mr. Pedagog with thanks. But we are still ramifying. Let us get back to inventions. Now I fully believe that the time is coming when some inventive genius will devise a method whereby intellect can be given to those who haven't any.

"It would fill me with regret, I say, if it were not that in taking up house-keeping I am I am to have the assistance of a better-half." "What??" cried the Bibliomaniac. "You? You are going to be to be married?" "Why not?" said the Idiot. "Imitation is the sincerest flattery. Mr. Pedagog marries, and I am going to flatter him as sincerely as I can by following in his footsteps."

Barlow in the matter, he told me that he liked me very much, and he had no doubt I would make a good husband for his daughter, but, after all, he added that I was nothing but a confidential clerk on a small salary, and he thought his daughter could do better." "She couldn't find a better fellow, Mr. Idiot," said Mrs. Pedagog, and Mr.

So far his books show that he is sixteen pounds of butter, seven pounds of tea, one bottle of vanilla extract, and a ton of ice ahead of the whole house. He is six eggs and a box of matches behind in his egg and match account, but under the circumstances I think he can afford it." "But," said Mrs. Pedagog, anxious to know the worst, "why er why are you so interested?"

He saw an island swarming with Indians, and said, 'Why, this must be India! And worst of all, if his pictures mean anything, he didn't even know enough to choose his face and stick to it. Don't talk Columbus to me unless you want to prove that luck is the greatest factor of success." "Ill-luck is sometimes a factor of success," said Mr. Pedagog.

Brief before the Idiot had a chance to reply to the Bibliomaniac's question. "I try to be a widely diverse character myself." "And, trying to sit on many stools, fall and become just an Idiot," said Mr. Pedagog. "That's according to the way you look at it. I put my company to the test in the crucible of my mind.

Pedagog, or your equivalents in the animal kingdom, the idea isn't worth the fabulous sum you offer." "You have quite aroused my interest," said Mr. Whitechoker. "Do you propose to start a new paper?" "You are a good guesser," replied the Idiot. "That is a part of the scheme but it isn't the idea. I propose to start a new paper in accordance with the plan which the idea contains."

The fed fools beat their brazen gong For gods' ears dulled by blatant praise, Awonder why the scented fumes And surplices at evensong Avail not as in other days. Shrunken and mean the spirit fails Like old snow falling from the crags And priest and pedagog compete With nostrums for the age that ails, But learn not why the spirit lags.

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