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Updated: May 5, 2025
And so it came about that three months later Reginald Simpkins lance-corporal and Shorty Bill private were seated on the fire-step of a trench side by side. With one continuous droning roar the shells passed over their heads and crumped into the German lines opposite. The days of peace for the battalion were over; in a quarter of an hour they were going over the top.
The whistle rose to a rush and a roar that cut off abruptly in a thunderous bang. The shell pitched harmlessly on the open ground between the forward and support trenches. Again came that faint 'slam, this time repeated by four, and the 'bouquet' of four shells crumped down almost on top of the support line. The four crashes might have been a signal to the British guns.
Of a sudden, however, the Captain burst into a roar of laughter. "It was worth it," he panted as he rolled in his saddle, "to see the poor blighters scatter. Lord! but it was lovely to hear that Major curse." For an hour and a half we had been crumped and whizz-banged and trench-mortared as never before, but it was not until the shelling slackened that one could really see the damage done.
There also, if sleep assailed us, we might curl up in an abandoned dugout and hope that it would not be "crumped" before the dawn. There were several of these shelters there, but, peering into them by the light of a match, I shuddered at the idea of lying in one of them. They had been long out of use and there was a foul look about the damp bedding and rugs which had been left to rot there.
Jane fach, whose shoulders were crumped and whose nose was as the beak of a parrot, put forth her head. "The reins of a flaming chariot can't drag me from him. Was he not father to me? Much he handed and more he promised." "Great is your avarice," Simon declared. "Fonder he was of me than any one," Annie cried. "The birthdays he presented me with dresses until he was sacked.
There are many of us who would cheerfully have been "crumped" to escape a "G.O.C.'s Inspection," but we have lived to be thankful even for these; they made our Platoon and Company organisation perfect. On the 30th we all went and listened to a lecture on Co-operation with Tanks, given by an Officer who had taken part in the recent fighting down South.
"Have they been shelling the avenues much?" I asked, referring to the various communication trenches leading to the front line. "Yes, sir. Nos. 1, 2 and 3 are being severely crumped. I would suggest No. 5, sir; it's as clear as any of them. I should advise you to get along this lane as fast as possible. I have been here some time, so I know Fritz's little ways."
If he'd been a bull instead of only roaring like one, they'd have brought him down, to say nothing of parson and the angel." "I couldn't help it, Tom. I was mad." "And no wonder, after being crumped on the nut with a tight umbrella. Why, I'd have done the same myself, baronite or no baronite.
A Glorious Band of Wounded Heroes Stagger Into Line and Answer the Call I Visit a Stricken Friend in a Dug-out On the Way to La Boisselle I Get Lost in the Trenches And Whilst Filming Unexpectedly Come Upon the German Line I Have a Narrow Squeak of Being Crumped But Get Away Safely And later Commandeer a Couple of German Prisoners to Act as Porters. The day wore on.
"The only problem we can't quite formulate is the machine-gun," said Leslie. The Boche's dug-outs here are thirty feet deep. When crumped by our artillery he withdraws his infantry and leaves his machine-gunners behind, safe underground.
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