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Updated: May 13, 2025
Ransome, sighing, and then laughing; "here, I'll give you some peppermint cushions for the little ones, and then you run along before I give you the roof off my head and the clothes off my back." All the things that had been collected for Perks were packed into the perambulator, and at half-past three Peter and Bobbie and Phyllis wheeled it down to the little yellow house where Perks lived.
"Oh, yes, you do, when Mother came down on purpose to tell you and Mr. Gills all about OUR Russian." "Can't you fancy it?" said Perks, indignantly; "don't you see 'im a-asking of me to step into 'is room and take a chair and listen to what 'er Ladyship 'as to say?" "Do you mean to say you've not heard?" "Not so much as a breath. I did go so far as to put a question.
He jumped up and kicked at the loose hay. "What?" said the others, eagerly. "Why, Perks is so nice to everybody. There must be lots of people in the village who'd like to help to make him a birthday. Let's go round and ask everybody." "Mother said we weren't to ask people for things," said Bobbie, doubtfully. "For ourselves, she meant, silly, not for other people. I'll ask the old gentleman too.
"You ARE an old dear," said Phyllis, throwing her arms around the old lady's fat waist. "Perks WILL be pleased." "He won't be half so pleased as I was with your needle-book and the tie and the pretty flowers and all," said the old lady, patting Phyllis's shoulder. "You're good little souls, that you are. Look here. I've got a pram round the back in the wood-lodge.
"Wewantedtotellyouonlywethoughtitwouldbestalenews." The three spoke all at once. Perks said it was all very well, and still held up the paper. Then Phyllis suddenly snatched it away, and threw her arms round his neck. "Oh, let's kiss and be friends," she said; "we'll say we're sorry first, if you like, but we didn't really know that you didn't know." "We are so sorry," said the others.
"Oh, they're all right, bless their hearts," said his wife; "it's you that's the aggravatingest old thing that ever was. I was ashamed of you I tell you " "You didn't need to be, old gal. I climbed down handsome soon as I understood it wasn't charity. But charity's what I never did abide, and won't neither." All sorts of people were made happy by that birthday party. Mr. Perks and Mrs.
"Come, mister," he said with a grin, evidently divining my thoughts, "out with it, come; you want them chesties smuggled off on the quiet, don't you now? Best take 'Badiah P. Perks into confidence, I guess; makes it smooth for all parties." "If you like to take our party and luggage to New York, Mr Perks," I said quietly, "I am ready, as my uncle will be ready, to pay you well for the passage.
I abominate politics more and more; we had glories, and would not keep them: well! content, that there was an end of blood; then perks prerogative its ass's ears up; we are always to be saving our liberties, and then staking them again! 'Tis wearisome! I hate the discussion, and yet one cannot always sit at a gaming-table and never make a bet.
They learned several interesting things from him among others that his name was Perks, that he was married and had three children, that the lamps in front of engines are called head-lights and the ones at the back tail-lights. "And that just shows," whispered Phyllis, "that trains really ARE dragons in disguise, with proper heads and tails."
Mortlake, gone off without any to Devonport, somewhere about four in the fog-thickened darkness of a winter night! Well, she hoped his journey would be duly rewarded, that his perks would be heavy, and that he would make as good a thing out of the "travelling expenses" as rival labour leaders roundly accused him of to other people's faces.
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