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Updated: June 30, 2025
I don't care for anyone in the whole world except her, my one and only! Even Hella can't understand that, in fact she thinks it dotty. Father wanted me to go to Hella's to change the current of my thoughts. Of course I hardly say a word about her to anyone, for no one understands me. But I never could have believed that Father would be just like anyone else. It's quite true that I'm getting thin.
It's such a pity that I can't ask Anneliese here, for Mother has been in bed for the last week. But she is going to Hella's on Sunday, and since I am going too of course I am frightfully glad. Naturally I would much rather have her here; but unfortunately it's impossible because of Mother.
Because of Hella the Br's are going to have the present giving at 5 o'clock, we shall have ours as usual at 7. December 26th. Yesterday and the day before I simply could not write a word. It was lovely here and at Hella's. I shan't write down all the things I got, because I've no time, and besides I know anyhow.
She passed me a little note asking me to get from her locker the parcel with the blotting-book for her father and the key basket for her mother and bring it to her because the things are not ready yet for Christmas. December 16th. Hella's better to-day. I've got to paint the blotting-book for her father. Thank goodness I can. She'll be able to finish the key basket herself, that's nothing.
Anyhow, Dora voluntarily renounces that possibility, if she is really going to marry Dr. 27th. Well, I went to Hella's yesterday and stayed till 9, and on Christmas Day she was here. I see that I wrote above that the Bs. were not well off; it seems to me to be very much the reverse.
Aunt Dora was very much upset, for she had been with us, but Father said: Hella's grandmother is quite an old lady, and in her day people had very different views in this respect. I should say so, in this respect, Hella finds it out a dozen times a day, all the things she must not say and must not do, and all the things which are unsuitable for young girls!
Most girls, especially when they get a little older; want the very opposite! and then it suddenly occurred to me that that was probably the real reason why Dora bade farewell to Lieutenant R., and not the friendship with Mother; it is really awfully funny, and no one would have thought it of her. Hella's father thinks me charming; he is really awfully nice.
As a matter of fact both Hella and I learned these things very early, and it has not done us any harm. Hella's mother always says that if one learns such things too early one gets to look old; but of course that's nonsense. But why do mothers not want us to know? I suppose they're just ashamed. June 16th.
At least the old gentleman said to Father the day before yesterday: "Thank the Lord, we shall soon be able to enjoy the comforts of home once more." That is what Hella's grandmother used to say before they came back from the country. And to-day I saw two great trunks standing in the passage just outside Herr Scharrer's room.
Hella's mother said to Hella, You are not a child any longer, but a grown-up; I do wish I were too!!! February 16th. We have a new schoolfellow. All the girls and all the staff are delighted with her. She is so small she might be only 10, but awfully pretty. She is the daughter of a bank manager in Hamburg; he shot himself, I don't know why.
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