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Updated: October 23, 2025
"Who's there?" called the voice of the quiet man. "'Tis I, Tom Heywood. there's to-do for players at the Falcon Inn. Gaston Carew hath stabbed Fulk Sandells, for cheating at the dice, as dead as a door-nail, and hath been taken by the watch!" It was Monday morning, and a beautiful day. Master Will Shakspere was reading a new play to Masters Ben Jonson and Diccon Burbage at the Mermaid Inn.
MARLEY was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. The register of his burial was signed by the clergyman, the clerk, the undertaker, and the chief mourner. Scrooge signed it: and Scrooge's name was good upon 'Change, for anything he chose to put his hand to. Old Marley was as dead as a door-nail. Mind!
"I did the day as you was buried, though things was that bad I had to sell my watch to pay my fare." "Here, quick! Tell me," cried Dick, whose turn it was to be staggered now, "you you they they did all this?" "To be sure they did; and you're as dead as a door-nail, sir. I see it all myself. Oh, my lad! how could you how could you go and drownd yourself like that?" "I go to drown myself!
Poor fellow, dead as a door-nail, and never knew what hurt him. He stood there like a statue no motion about him, except that his plumes swished about a little in the night wind. We rose up and looked in through the bars of his visor, but couldn't make out whether we knew him or not features too dim and shadowed. We heard muffled sounds approaching, and we sank down to the ground where we were.
His powerful tail came "flap" against the nearest, and it was pitched several yards, where, after a kick or two, it lay upon its side as dead as a herring, a door-nail, or even Julius Caesar take your choice. The chiguires that escaped past the crocodile, the next instant plunged into the river, and disappeared under the water.
But malice, which travels fastest of all things, must be dead and cold at starting, when it can thus have lingered in the rear for six years; and therefore, though the world was so far right, that people do say, 'Dead as a door-nail, yet, henceforward, the weakest of these people will see the propriety of saying 'Dead as Gillman's Coleridge.
"Dead as a door-nail," he muttered, after laying his ear to the lips, and one hand on the too impetuous heart, "Who takes command? This is a hanging job, I'm thinking." There was nobody to take command, not even a petty officer. The command fell to the readiest mind, as it must in such catastrophes. "Jem, you do it," whispered two or three; and being so elected, he was clear.
You will, therefore, permit me to repeat, emphatically, that Marley was as dead as a door-nail. Scrooge knew he was dead? Of course he did. How could it be otherwise? Scrooge and he were partners for I don't know how many years. Scrooge was his sole executor, his sole administrator, his sole assign, his sole residuary legatee, his sole friend, and sole mourner.
Browne handed the gun to Jorrocks, who, giving up his hunter in exchange, strode off, and having marked his bird accurately, he kicked him up out of a bit of furze, and knocked him down as "dead as a door-nail." By that pheasant's tail hangs the present one.
"You have an odd way of talking, Arthur, which doesn't do you justice. As I said, you have more than once made me wonder whether you were not keeping back something about this wretched affair which I ought to know." "Honour bright, I know a jolly lot less about it than you; so you really needn't be afraid of me; and Dig's safe too. Safe as a door-nail."
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