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Updated: May 19, 2025
"How would it do," he asked, turning to Laura again, "to call it the 'United States of Fenelby? Or the 'Commonwealth of Fenelby? No!" he exclaimed, "I'll tell you what we will call it we will call it the 'Commonwealth of Bobberts, for that is what it is. 'The Domestic Tariff of the Commonwealth of Bobberts!" "Yes," said Mrs.
Fenelby, but even as he said it Bobberts wailed. His voice arose clear and strong in protest against that or against something else. The kitchen door swung open and the Dictator ran in and approached the Heir, and Bobberts held out his arms. "Bless th' darlin'," said Bridget, cuddling him in her arms, but Mrs. Fenelby frowned. "Give him to me," she said sternly, and Bridget turned to her.
Job, under those circumstances was probably as placid as could be expected, but not hilarious, and neither was Mr. Fenelby. Dinner was as gloomy as breakfast had been. It developed into one of the plate-studying kind, with each of the four eating hastily and silently. Even Bobberts was not cheerful. He did not "coo" as usual, but stared unsmilingly at the ceiling.
He looked cheerfully at the world through rather strong spectacles, and everyone said how much he looked like Bobberts. Mrs. Fenelby was younger, but she took a much more matter-of-fact view of life and things, and Mr. Fenelby never ceased congratulating himself on having married her. "My wife Laura," he would say to his friends, "has great executive ability. She is a wonder.
We are asked to do this merely because there has been some slight difficulty in collecting the tariff tax. I am ashamed to be a State in a commonwealth that can put forward such an excuse. I care not what others may do, but as for me I shall never cast my vote to rob that poor innocent," he pointed feelingly toward Bobberts, "to rob him of his future happiness! Never.
Fenelby walked part of the way to the station to meet Tom when he came home, and her eyes brightened when she saw the square parcel that she knew to be the box of candy, in his hand. He kissed her, right there on the street, as suburban husbands are not ashamed to do, and put the box of candy in her hand. "And what do you think my news is?" he asked, after he had asked about Bobberts.
Fenelby, remembering Billy's protestations of dislike for girls. "I'll do my duty by you and Bobberts, old man," said Billy, generously. "I was only going to say that Laura could look out for that sort of thing," said Mr. Fenelby. "I might say a word to her." "Well, now, I didn't like to bring that part of it up," said Billy, "but since you mention it, I guess I had better say the whole thing.
Bobberts is our child, Tom, and it ought to be for us to say what we will save for him, and how we will save it." "That is just what I think," said Mr. Fenelby feelingly, "and I am not going to stand it any longer. I am going to have another meeting of congress this afternoon " "They will vote just the same way," said Laura, hopelessly. "Probably," said Mr. Fenelby.
The only thing I am afraid of is that she will go and buy things she doesn't need or want, just in order that she can put money in Bobberts' bank," said Mrs. Fenelby. "I told Bridget about the tariff to-day, and she was so interested! Every one I tell about it thinks it is a splendid idea, and wonders how you could think of it."
The money in the little pig bank was officially known as "Bobberts' Education Fund," and next to Bobberts himself was the thing in the house most talked about. It was "Tom, dear, have you put your pennies in the bank this evening?" or "I say, Laura, how about Bobberts' pennies to-day. Are you holding out on him?"
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