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Updated: June 29, 2025
I had appeared out of the void at the Kyle, and I had made but a poor appearance as a bagman, showing no knowledge of my own trade. I was in an area interdicted to the ordinary public; and he had good reason to keep an eye on my movements. He was going south, and so was I; clearly we must somehow part company. 'We change at Muirtown, don't we? I asked. 'When does the train for the south leave?
There were always bundles of patches to give away, so useful to poor mothers; strips of rag for hurts; old flannel, and often new; a little collection of rubbish now and then for the bagman, though very rarely, the breakage being small where there were so few hands used, and they so careful.
"Oh, but nobody up here has got a palate left," says the bagman, laughing in a very superior sort of way. "What do you mean, sir?" shouted Carew, jumping up. "I'll not have any d d bagmen coming here to insult me!" By George, if you'll believe me, Carew had a false palate, with a little bit of sponge in the middle, and we all knew it, except the bagman.
If any bagman of that day could have caught sight of the little neck-or-nothing sort of gig, with a clay-coloured body and red wheels, and the vixenish, ill tempered, fast-going bay mare, that looked like a cross between a butcher's horse and a twopenny post-office pony, he would have known at once, that this traveller could have been no other than Tom Smart, of the great house of Bilson and Slum, Cateaton Street, City.
'Well, two fours twice four's eight, eh? and his two hind ones make ten. 'Hoots, growled George, amidst the mirth of his comrades, 'you're makin' a fool o' one. 'Turn them out a bagman? suggested Mr. Sponge, in an undertone; adding, 'Watchorn has a three-legged 'un, I know, in the hay-loft. 'New Year's Day, too most likely away, seeing his young hounds at walk.
The way we arranged these matters then was a general settling-up day after the races were over; every one squared up his books and planked ready money down on the nail, or if he hadn't got it he went and borrowed from some one else to do it with. The bagman paid up what he owed the others, and I began to feel a bit sorry for the fellow when he came to me that night to finish up.
Ever travelling, following the profession of a jeweller's bagman, her husband, who earned a deal of money, would disappear for six months at a stretch, deceive her from one frontier to the other of France, at times even carrying creatures about with him.
And with that he dropped his eyes, and seemed to consider the subject at an end. Our curiosity was mightily excited at this. How, or why, or when, was this lymphatic bagman martyred? We concluded at once it was on some religious question, and brushed up our memories of the Inquisition, which were principally drawn from Poe's horrid story, and the sermon in "Tristram Shandy," I believe.
Did ever the bagman of an oil and colour firm speed about his duties with such springs of excitement bubbling within him? And Mrs. Clover? Ought she not to be told at once? Had he any right to keep to himself such a discovery as this? He knew, by police court precedent, that a false name in marriage did not invalidate the contract. Beyond shadow of doubt Mrs. Clover was Lady Polperro.
"The honorable gent says I must fight if I don't pay," whimpered Sam. "What! fight YOU? Do you mean that the honorable gent, as you call him, will go out with a bagman?" "He doesn't know I'm a I'm a commercial man," blushingly said Sam: "he fancies I'm a military gent." The Major's gravity was quite upset at this absurd notion; and he laughed outrageously.
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