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Updated: June 5, 2025
"And this lady," said I, motioning with my head to the elder female, "is, I suppose, your wife." "She is, your haner, and the children which your haner sees are my children." "And who is this young lady?" said I, motioning to the uncouth- looking girl. "The young lady, as your haner is pleased to call her, is a daughter of a sister of mine who is now dead, along with her husband.
"I cannot comprehend him," she added to the lady of the mansion. "Arrah, maybe I'd make bould to take up the manners from you fwhor a while, my lady, Plase yer haner?" said Phil, addressing the latter. "I do not properly understand you," she replied, "speak plainer."
"Thank your haner; is it whorid toarst the house abow, sir? I wouldn't be standin' up, sir, wit you about a thrifle; an you'll have her, sir, fwhor any thing you plase beyant a pound, yer haner; an' 'tis throwin' her away it is: but one can't be hard wit a rale gintleman any way." "You only annoy me, man; besides I don't want the pig; you lose time; I don't want to buy it, I repeat to you."
Put Munster agin Connaught, one-half on this side, an' the odher an that, to keep the crathur of a ship steady, your haner; an' fwhin you have thim half an' half, wit a little room betuxt thim, 'now, says yer haner, 'boys, you're divided into two halves; if one side kicks the other out o' the ship, I'll bring the conquirors."
Why, your haner," said Purcel, after a little hesitation, "it sometimes goes up of a mornin' to waken the childhre, particularly when the buckwhist happens to be late. It doesn't like to be waitin'; and sure none of us likes to be kept from the male's mate, your haner, when we want it, no more than it, the crathur!"
"No, slur; she was willin' enough to come; but her fadher wouldn't consint, and so we made off wit' ourselves." This was a topic on which the squire, for obvious reasons, did not like to press him. It was in fact a sore subject, and, accordingly, he changed it. "I suppose you have been about the country a good deal?" "I have, indeed, your haner."
"She'd flog the counthry side, sir; an' if the misthress herself, sir, 'ud shake the wishp o' sthraw fwor her in the kitchen, sir, near the whoire. Yer haner could spake to her about it; an' in no time put a knife into her whin you plazed. In regard o' the other thing, sir she's like a Christyeen, yer haner, an' no throuble, sir, if you'd be seein' company or any thing."
The degree of estimation in which these civilized English held Phil was so low, that this conversation took place within a few yards of him, precisely as if he had been an animal of an inferior species, or one of the aborigines of New Zealand. "Pray what is your name?" inquired the matron. "Phadhrumshagh Corfuffle, plase yer haner: my fadher carried the same name upon him.
"Has your haner then ever followed tinkering?" said the man. "Yes," said I, "but I soon left off." "And became a minister," said the elder female, "Well, your honour is not the first indifferent tinker that's turned out a shining minister." "Why do you think me a minister?" "Because your honour has the very look and voice of one.
The man was about the same age as the elder woman; he had rather a sharp look, and was dressed in hat, white frock-coat, corduroy breeches, long stockings and shoes. I gave them the seal of the evening. "Good evening to your haner," said the man "Good evening to you, sir," said the woman; whilst the younger mumbled something, probably to the same effect, but which I did not catch.
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