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Updated: May 22, 2025
Chitterling Crabtree attended all the meetings at the Crown and Anchor subscribed to the aid of the suffering friends of freedom harangued, argued, sweated, wrote was fined and imprisoned regained his liberty, and married his wife loved a community of goods no less than her spouse, and ran off with one citizen, while he was running on to the others.
"You are the one man I should have delighted to call master, to have done your bidding. That had been a thing different indeed! But you love me not. You love a chit, a chitterling a pretty thing that can but peep and mutter, whose heart's depths I have sounded with my finger-nail, and whose babyish vanity I have tickled with a straw." This was enough and too much.
"It is because thou hast only one eye, friend; open the other, and thou shalt see two," said the conjuror, in a slow, malicious tone, with his neck extended, and his hand with the hateful box outstretched in it. "Now, by our black Lady of Altoting, I'll soon stop thy prate, chitterling!" bellowed the enraged Bohemian.
After that he asked several nice questions concerning the apparition of that flying hog. She answered that it was the idea of Carnival, their tutelary god in time of war, first founder and original of all the Chitterling race; for which reason he resembled a hog, for Chitterlings drew their extraction from hogs.
There you will find a cloud of witnesses, not of your affidavit-men of the right stamp, but credible time out of mind, that will take their corporal oath, on Rigome's knuckle-bone, that Melusina their founder or foundress, which you please, was woman from the head to the prick-purse, and thence downwards was a serpentine Chitterling, or if you'll have it otherwise, a Chitterlingdized serpent.
Twenty covers were laid in the great hall where people dined on market-days, and the big leg of mutton turning before the spit, the fowl browned under their own gravy, the chitterling roasting over the warm bright fire, filled the house with a thick odor of coal sprinkled with fat the powerful and heavy odor of rustic fare.
Friar John, with an iron crow, knocked them down as fast as hops; his men, too, were not sparing on their side. Oh, what a woeful sight it was! the field was all over strewed with heaps of dead or wounded Chitterlings; and history relates that had not heaven had a hand in it, the Chitterling tribe had been totally routed out of the world by the culinary champions.
Well, beautiful Lisa just gave her the photograph; she slipped it into her hand with the chitterling." Fresh salutations were then seen to pass between the two women; and the beautiful Lisa, exceeding even the courtesies which had been agreed upon, accompanied the beautiful Norman to the footway.
What were bread, meat, and beer, to the champion of equality! He went to the meeting that very night: he said he gloried in his losses they were for the cause: the whole conclave rang with shouts of applause, and Mr. Chitterling Crabtree went to bed happier than ever. I need not pursue his history farther; you see him here verbum sat.
Gordon, after a deep draught at the purl, thus began: "You observe yon thin, meagre, cadaverous animal, with rather an intelligent and melancholy expression of countenance his name is Chitterling Crabtree: his father was an eminent coal-merchant, and left him L10,000. Crabtree turned politician. When fate wishes to ruin a man of moderate abilities and moderate fortune, she makes him an orator. Mr.
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