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Updated: June 12, 2025
"Call it a loan, then. I can't stand by and see the paper licked by Pierce. Fifty thousand won't touch me. And it'll save you." "Please, Dad, I can't do it." "Is it because it's Certina money?" Hal turned miserable eyes on his father. "Hadn't we better keep away from that?" "I don't get you at all on that," cried the charlatan. "Why, it's business. It's legal.
At one stage of their acquaintance familiarity had predominated, when having put through a petty but particularly rancid steal for the benefit of the Certina business, O'Farrell had become inspired with effusiveness to the extent of addressing his patron as "Doc." He never made that particular error again. Yet, to the credit of Dr.
So much Hal gathered from the offhand and cheerily friendly greetings which were exchanged between the head of the vast concern and such employees, important or humble, as they chanced to meet in their wanderings. First they went to the printing-plant, the Certina Company doing all its own printing; then to what Dr. Surtaine called "the literary bureau."
Since that day of his first visit to the Certina factory, Hal's standards had undergone an intrinsic but unconscious alteration. Brought up to the patent medicine trade, though at a distance, he thought of it, by habit, as on a par with other big businesses. One whose childhood is spent in a glue factory is not prone to be supersensitive to odors.
From the testimonial room they went to the art department where Dr. Surtaine had some suggestions to make as to bill-board designs. "You'll never get another puller like Old Lame-Boy," Hal heard the head designer say with a chuckle, and his father reply: "If I could I'd start another proprietary as big as Certina."
But morphine seems a pretty dangerous thing for people to take indiscriminately." "Well, it's out. There ain't a grain of it in Certina to-day." "I'm glad of it." "Oh, I don't know. It's useful in its place. For instance, you can't run a soothing-syrup without it.
Surtaine runs 'em all, and every one's a winner. Not that I keep much track of 'em. We only handle the Certina correspondence in our room. I know what that can do. Why, I take Certina myself when there's anything the matter with me." "Do you?" said Hal, much interested. "Well, you're certainly a living testimonial to its efficacy." "All the people in the shop take it.
The special employee of Certina was a person of diverse information and judicious counsel. His chief had not incorrectly described him as the diplomat of the trade. No small diplomacy had been required for the planning of the Emergency Committee scheme, the details of which Mr. Couch had worked out, himself. It was, as he boasted to Dr. Surtaine, "a clincher."
He's the best little worrier in the trade, Old Lame-Boy is. He just pesters folks into taking proper care of themselves. They get Certina, and we get their dollars. And they get their money's worth, too," he added as an afterthought for Hal's benefit, "for it's a mighty good thing to have your kidneys tonicked up at this time of year."
"Are you scattering the blessings of Certina amongst a grateful proletariat?" "Not exactly. I'm down here on some other business." "Well, I won't keep you from it, Dr. Surtaine. Good-bye." The swinging doors of a saloon opened almost upon her, and a short, broad-shouldered foreigner, in a ruffled-up silk hat, bumped into her lightly and apologized. He jogged up to Dr. Surtaine.
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