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Updated: June 22, 2025
Fink-Nottle in the garden, sir, while you were still in bed, and we had a brief conversation." "And you came away feeling that he needed a bracer?" "Very much so, sir. His attitude struck me as defeatist." I nodded. "I felt the same. 'Defeatist' sums it up to a nicety. Did you tell him his attitude struck you as defeatist?" "Yes, sir." "But it didn't do any good?" "No, sir."
Fink-Nottle to advise him on his affairs?" This, I admit, opened up a new line of thought. In the stress of my emotions, I had clean forgotten about having taken Gussie's interests in hand. It altered things. One can't give the raspberry to a client. I mean, you didn't find Sherlock Holmes refusing to see clients just because he had been out late the night before at Doctor Watson's birthday party.
I ran into him on the lawn, and I could see at a glance that if ever there was a man who needed a snappy stimulant, it was he. All nature, as I have indicated, was smiling, but not Augustus Fink-Nottle. He was walking round in circles, muttering something about not proposing to detain us long, but on this auspicious occasion feeling compelled to say a few words.
I mean, I had wanted a braced Fink-Nottle indeed, all my plans had had a braced Fink-Nottle as their end and aim but I found myself wondering a little whether the Fink-Nottle now sliding down the banister wasn't, perhaps, a shade too braced. His demeanour seemed to me that of a man who might quite easily throw bread about at lunch.
Of the amiability which she had exhibited when discussing this unhappy chump's activities with me over the fruit salad, no trace remained, and I was not surprised that speech more or less froze on the Fink-Nottle lips.
The serpent Fink-Nottle." This seemed to me absolute gibbering. "But Gussie loves the Bassett." "You can't all love this blighted Bassett. What astonishes me is that anyone can do it. He loves Angela, I tell you. And she loves him." "But Angela handed you your hat before Gussie ever got here." "No, she didn't. Couple of hours after."
Almost immediately after she had dispatched the above heart cry, Gussie must have arrived, for it wasn't twenty minutes later when I received the following: Cipher telegram signed by you has reached me here. Runs "Lay off the sausages. Avoid the ham." Wire key immediately. Fink-Nottle. I replied: Also kidneys. Cheerio. Bertie.
He touched Gussie on the arm, and Gussie, turning sharply and seeing a large bloke with a beard apparently about to bean him with a book, sprang back in an attitude of self-defence. "Perhaps, as time is getting on, Mr. Fink-Nottle, we had better " "Oh, ah," said Gussie, getting the trend. He relaxed. "The prizes, eh? Of course, yes. Right-ho. Yes, might as well be shoving along with it.
"Thank you, sir, I will remain in." I surveyed him narrowly. "Is this dudgeon, Jeeves?" "No, sir, I am obliged to remain on the premises. Mr. Fink-Nottle informed me he would be calling to see me this evening." "Oh, Gussie's coming, is he? Well, give him my love." "Very good, sir." "Yes, sir." "And a whisky and soda, and so forth." "Very good, sir." "Right ho, Jeeves."
Augustus Fink-Nottle without an anaesthetic. I put this to her, and she was forced to admit the justice of it. "All right, then. Perhaps I don't." "Then what," I said keenly, "did you want to go and get engaged to him for, you unreasonable young fathead?" "I thought it would be fun." "Fun!" "And so it has been. I've had a lot of fun out of it. You should have seen Tuppy's face when I told him."
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