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Updated: June 27, 2025
"Tell 'im I've come back from Australia, if you like," said Mr. Price, faintly. "I don't mind." Mr. Spriggs cleared his throat again. "But, you see, we told Ethel as you was doing well out there," he said, with an embarrassed laugh, "and girl-like, and Alfred talking a good deal about his relations, she she's made the most of it." "It don't matter," said the complaisant Mr.
"Except what's in the bank," said his brother-in-law. "It'll take you a day or two to get at it, I know. S'pose we say Saturday for the watch and chain?" Mr. Spriggs looked helplessly at his wife, but she avoided his gaze. He turned and gazed in a fascinated fashion at Mr. Price, and received a cheerful nod in return. "I'll come with you and help choose it," said the latter.
It's a good thing you've come at last, for the children are makin' sawdust and splinters of every bit of crockery in the house, and that Martha Spriggs has no more management than a settin' hen. I don't suppose you'll be much better, though. You never did hev much of a head, an' now you've been up among the clouds so long, you'll be more like to sugar the butter and salt the pies than before.
She looked at the solitary lamp with its grotesquely hideous ornament of red flannel, at Susan's expressionless, freckled face, at the boys in their copper-toed boots and overalls, at the good-natured, but hopelessly common-place Martha Spriggs, with her thin hair drawn tight into a knob the size of a bullet, and her bare arms akimbo.
Spriggs; "if he does, we must try and get rid of 'im; and, if he won't go, we must tell Alfred that he's been to Australia, same as we did Ethel." His wife smiled faintly. "That's the ticket," continued Mr. Spriggs. "For one thing, I b'leeve he'll be ashamed to show his face here; but, if he does, he's come back from Australia. See? It'll make it nicer for 'im too.
But the two pirate vessels finding themselves outsailed, separated, and Farrington Spriggs, who commanded the schooner in which I was, stood in for the shore.
"Emma!" said a mournful voice, as the upper part of the intruder's body followed the face. "Gussie!" said Mrs. Spriggs, rising in disorder. Mr. Price drew his legs into the room, and, closing the door with extraordinary care, passed the cuff of his coat across his eyes and surveyed them tenderly.
You've told more things 'at Spriggs done in his thirty years of life than would ha' kept most men busy till they was a hundered!" cried Moses, petulantly. "And if Kitty Keehoty, or Monty, ary one, comes 'round, do for pity's sake send 'em up. Here I lie, ball-an'-chained to a bed and things Oh, dear!" It was Saturday and a busy time for the housekeeper.
"I've come home to die," he said, slowly, and, tottering across the room, embraced his sister with much unction. "What are you going to die of?" inquired Mr. Spriggs, reluctantly accepting the extended hand. "Broken 'art, George," replied his brother-in-law, sinking into a chair. Mr. Spriggs grunted, and, moving his chair a little farther away, watched the intruder as his wife handed him a plate.
The surplus would not go to you; your wants are adequately provided for, and your position could hardly be improved." "God bless your reverence, we knows it," said Spriggs. "It's all true, your reverence," said Skulpit. "We sees it all now."
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