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Updated: June 2, 2025
"I'll tell you what," said Stephen, changing the subject, "it's cool cheek of them calling us `it, as if we were things." "So they have," exclaimed Paul; "oh, I say, that's too much; I'll let them know I'm not a thing." "Yes, you are a thing, isn't he, Padger? A regular it," exclaimed the vindictive Bramble. "Yah, boo, old `its, both of you."
Among the speakers were Bramble, Paul, and Stephen; while Padger, Walker, and Rook did very good execution with their fists. About half-past seven the dust was so dense that it was impossible to see across the room; but those who knew reported that there was another row on about Greenfield senior, and that Paul and Padger were having their twenty-seventh round!
Bramble looked wildly about him, if haply he might escape by a window or lie hid in a desk; while Stephen, Paul, Padger, and the other ringleaders, gave themselves up for lost, and mentally bade farewell to joy for ever. "What have the boys been reading?" inquired Dr Senior of Mr Rastle. "Grey's Elegy, sir. We have just got through it." "Oh!
"Hullo, I say, look here!" cried Stephen, turning quite yellow; "the Doctor's in it, they say, Bramble. `The small animals' that's you and Padger `are to be kept in their own quarters. Whew! there's a go." "What!" shrieked Bramble, "who says so? The Doctor never said so. I shall do what I choose. He never said so. Bother the Doctor! Who's coming to the meeting, eh?"
"Greenfield senior free!" shouted the loyal Paul. "Bah! do you think Greenfield senior would come to hear you spout, you young muff!" roared the amiable Bramble. "I know what he would come for," retorted Paul, "and I'd come with him too. Guess!" "Shan't guess. Shall I, Padger?" "May as well," suggested Padger.
At first it was borne with interest, then with impatience; then, when Stephen began to whisper to Paul, and Paul began to signal to Bramble, and Bramble gesticulated in dumb show at Padger, and all four whispered together, and finally looked very gravely in an opposite direction to the audience, then they began to be amused.
The first was as follows: "Lessons. Padger the Tadpole writes to ask, `How do you do lessons? The answer is a simple one, Padger. If you are a member of the Fourth Junior, as we have a vague idea you are, the way of `doing' lessons there is as follows: Sit at a desk full of old cherry-stones, orange-peel, and dusty sherbet, and put your elbows on it.
"What does it mean, Padger?" asked Bramble, who, never much of a scholar, was quite unable to master the meaning of this. "It's all a pack of crams," replied Padger, not quite sure of the sense himself. "It means," said Stephen, "the fellows say they are jolly glad to get rid of us." "Eh?" yelled Bramble; "oh, I say, you fellows, come to the meeting! Jolly glad! They aren't a bit glad."
"Oh," said Stephen, very red, turning round abruptly after this awkward pause had continued for a minute or two "oh, that was wrong; he doesn't begin, and the other fellow's away. Look here, Bramble, do your thing now." "No, I can't," whispered Bramble in an audible voice. "I've forgotten the first line." "Something about a kid asleep," suggested Padger, also audibly.
Padger suggested that young Greenfield might possibly have to have his cheek cut off if he didn't look-out, and Paul said the sooner he "stashed his cheek" the better. The result of this friendly and witty conference was that Stephen took it into his head to cure his cheek, and to that end applied for leave from Mr Rastle to go down that afternoon to Maltby to get something from the chemist.
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